The Nefarious Nine
by Tobi wants a cookie
Summary: Inspired by Tarantino's The Hateful Eight, the story follows Naruto, an assassin stranded in the middle of the desert, as he's picked up by an old friend, Killer Bee, who's taking in a wanted criminal, Fu, who's worth over 100,00 ryo! With a sandstorm approaching, the driver, Han, takes them to a shop to rest for the night. That storm would soon be the least of their worries...
1. A Fortuitous Wagon

Welcome everyone, to a Tarantino inspired fanfic, The Nefarious Nine! As stated in the description, it's not a crossover, but it is directly inspired by the hit film, The Hateful Eight. This fanfic won't be following the events of the film to a tee, but there will certainly be some similarities. I don't want to give away too much, as part of this fanfic is based on mystery. If you've seen the movie there will be some things that you may see coming, though I doubt it, but if you do start to pick up on something, please don't spoil it for anyone else. This will be like a stylized western/samurai themed story, taking place in something akin to early to mid 1800's. Lastly, I'll be posting on a bi-weekly bases. Thank you so much for reading, and be sure to review.

IMPORTANT NOTE-After calculating the ryo exchange rate and inflation for the time period, (Yes, I actually did that.) I found that any ryo amount I mention would translate to roughly six times as much in American dollars. So basically, one ryo is worth six modern US dollars in this fanfic. Just thought you may want a frame of reference.

SPECIAL THANKS-A special thanks to fellow author acw28, who has been a huge part of developing this fanfic. Much like with my other fanfic, the Red Fox, he's functioning largely like a producer on this story. I'd highly recommend checking out his Naruto, RWBY, and various other stories. My friend stealth8604 let me bounce a few idea off him as well, so I'll give him a shout out too.

FINAL NOTE-This is NOT a Naruto x Fu fanfic, so please, don't ask!

Chapter Soundtrack-America: Horse With No Name

* * *

The desert winds of Suna were a cruel and merciless mistress. Even during the times when the sandstorms subsided, a good gust from the dunes could scorch you during the day and freeze you at night. A young man, no older than 20, sat on three corpses in the middle of that desert, puffing away at a cigar in his hand. He had sun kissed blond hair, whisker marks on his cheeks, and deep blue eyes. Lying next to him was a dead horse who'd been shot in the head, thought it looked as though it's leg had been broken before that. As he sat on those bodies, puffing away at that cigar, the young man had nothing to do but wait. Wait and pray someone rode by to help him out of this piss poor situation. As if to answer his prayers, he could see something off in the distance that looked an awful lot like a wagon, "I guess sometimes I do get lucky, assuming I can get a ride from these guys that is…"

Putting out the other half of his cigar so he could smoke it later, the blond stood up and brushed some of the sand off from himself, walking out a little past the bodies. Kicking up plenty of sand along the way, the wagon was soon in front of him, lead by a team of six horses with a man covered by massive red straw hat holding the reigns. The man halted the horses when he saw the young man in his path, noting the pile of dead men and the horse with a bullet hole in it. He asked in gruff voice, "Who the hell are you? And what happened to all them?"

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki," The young man replied, a wide grin on his face, "I'm an assassin taking in a few bodies so that I can get my pay. Don't worry, I'm legal. I'll get you my papers in a second if you want them. I was taking these three here, some gang members by the names of Sasori, Deidara, and Hidan, into Suna so that I could get my money. My horse got startled by a snake and ended up getting his leg caught in a hole. He broke it and I've got no way to get him back to Suna, so I had to put him down. Too bad, cause he was a damn good horse. Mind if I ask you your name?"

It was hard to gauge the man's reaction without being able to see his face, but the tone of his voice didn't change, "You can call me Han. I'm guess you were hoping to get a ride with us, weren't ya?"

Naruto nodded, looking out on the horizon, "Considering I can see a sandstorm coming a few miles behind us, I'm gonna say yeah, I'd like a ride."

"If it were just me, I'd say show me the papers, give some ryos, and let's get the hell in there, but it's not just not me," Han explained, motioning to the back of his wagon, "My passenger paid a lot of money for private ride with him and his prisoner, with special emphasis on the privacy part. If want to ride with us, you'll have to talk him into it."

Talking people into things was a speciality of Naruto's, so that wasn't an issue for him, "In that case, I'll go and have a word with your passenger. Shouldn't take too long."

"Hold on one second," Han said as Naruto was about to walk past him. When the young man turned, he found he was face to face with a double barreled shotgun, "I need you hand me any guns and any blades you've got on you. His cargo's precious, so my passenger wants me to be careful. Nothing personal."

Naruto hated the idea of not being armed to the teeth, but he didn't have much of a choice. He'd die if he was left out here alone. With a reluctant groan, he pulled out two revolvers, a large hunting knife, and a tanto blade, handing them all to Han, who then put away his shotgun. Once he was finished, he continues his walk towards the wagon's door, ready to have a word with this passenger. He had barely gotten any closer when he heard, "Hold it right there blondie! Take one step further, and I'll put a knife in your throat! Does Han have your weapons?"

This was starting to get ridiculous, "Yeah, he's got them. Can we speed this whole thing up? In case you haven't noticed, that sandstorm that's coming for us is only getting closer."

"I've noticed," The voice replied, a shining blade now visible through the wagon's window, "Now, slowly, and I mean sloooowly, you walk up her and let me see your face. After that, you explain to me who you are and we'll see if I'll let you in here. Got it?"

Naruto growled, "Yeah, I got it."

He took a few steps forward, starting to make out the face of the man in the wagon. He had dark skin, a goatee, and wore a bandana over his forehead, along with some dark, round sunglasses over his eyes. The two recognized each other instinctively, but the man in the wagon spoke first, "Naruto Uzumaki? Fuck me, is that you bro?"

"Killer Bee, you big bastard," Naruto identified, "Talk about a small world. What's it been, a year since you and me fought in the same trenches?"

The man, now known as Killer Bee, put his blade away, "Something like that, yeah. Hard to believe the war was that long ago. What in the hell are you doing all the way out here for?"

"I'm still in the assassin business, taking a few guys in for a nice pay day," Naruto replied, taking some papers out of his pocket, "If you'll let me come over, I'll show you their paperwork. I'm hoping to get a ride with you guys, and I can pay too. Each one of three morons I killed was worth 25,000 ryo."

Bee motioned him over, allowing Naruto to close the gap and hand him the papers. After looking them over one by one, he handed them back, still with pondering the situation, "Well, usually any war bro of mine is someone I'd give a ride to, no questions asked. You have to understand though, I've got a bitch chained to my wrist worth a whole lot of money. 100,000 ryo to be exact."

Naruto's jaw just about hit the ground, "Damn! What'd she do? Kill a Kage?"

"May as well have," Bee fired back, a loud gust of wind blowing behind him as he spoke, "Damn, storm's getting closer, and I don't wanna get caught in it. We'd better hurry this up."

It was good to see the man still had a decent head on his shoulders, "Neither of us wanna end up dead, so I'll make you a deal. If you let me ride with you guys to wherever it is you're going, Suna I'm guessing, I'll pay for part of the cost to get us there, and I promise to let Han keep my weapons. You and I both know I can't kill you with my hands alone. Sound fair to you?"

"I guess it does," Bee responded after a moment, "Have Han help you get those bodies of yours up on the roof, and then we'll move out. We're gonna have to stop at shop pretty soon, since there's no way our asses are gonna get to Suna before that sandstorm hits. I'd help, but I gotta stayed chained to this bitch. Believe me, it's not any more fun that what you'll be doing."

Though he hadn't met the girl, Naruto had a feeling that was true. As he turned to go and grab the bodies, he heard a female voice from inside the wagon, "Hold on, you aren't really gonna let an Uzumaki travel with us, are you? Don't you know they're, agh!"

A loud smacking sound could be heard emanating from the wagon, followed by Bee's bellowing voice, "What I know is that he's friend of mine, and you'd better respect him, you nasty brat!"

"Ha, sounds like she's having a rough time," Naruto said with a laugh, "This should be a fun ride. Han, if you'd be so kind, we've got a few dead bodies to move."

* * *

With the three stiffs tied firmly up on the roof, the wagon ride commened once more, with one new passenger in tow. Naruto had heard of the driver, Han, before as he came highly recommended all around the elemental nations. The man was one hell of driver who hailed from the Hidden Rock village, though now he lived pretty much anywhere his wagon took him. Not only could he drive a six horse team through just about any terrain, but he was also tough as nails, able to defend his wagon from any bandits who'd try and take it down. Naruto didn't feel so much as a bump as he sat back in the wagon, eyeing the tan, green haired girl in front of him. She had some blood on her nose, likely from when Bee had smacked her. So far she'd done nothing but give Naruto the stink eye, which he didn't mind. It was something he'd grown accustomed to, "So Bee, who is this girl? She's gotta be pretty famous, right? I mean, it's not everyday someone who looks as young as me gets a 100,000 ryo bounty on her head."

Bee took out a long stemmed pipe from his coat pocket and lit it before beginning the conversation, "Yeah, you've probably heard of her. She's Fu, of the Hidden Waterfall village."

"Wait, Fu? As in 'Fuck you' Fu, leader of that all female gang that's been tearing half the freaking Elemental Nations for the past two years? That Fu?" Naruto asked, noting the girl's smirk as he rattled off her reputation, "Well shit, that explains the price on her head. They've been looking for her for a long time."

What he'd said was true, but it wasn't the reason she was worth so much, "Actually, until a couple of weeks ago, she was only worth 50,000 ryo. A little low, but I think they wanted to go easy on her since she's a woman. She did something real nasty that made all the Villages double the price on her head. Tell the man, Fu. I want you to have to say it yourself."

Fu rolled her eyes, "Want me to the tell the Uzumaki bastard what I did? Fine. When I was passing through the Hidden Leaf village, I ran into some stuck up bitch from the Hyuuga clan. The plan was to kidnap her and put her up for a big ass ransom. I think her name was Hinata. She struggled though, and one thing lead to another and I uh...kinda slit her throat."

"You slit the throat of the Hyuuga clan heiress?" Naruto asked, wided eyed. He half remembered meeting the girl a handful of times back when he lived in the Hidden Leaf, "You must be out of your damn mind! That's the richest clan in the world!"

Another eye roll, "I wouldn't have gotten much cash out of them if they were a poor clan, now would I? Go big or go home, that's what I always say. Worst part of this whole thing is, they added a 50,000 ryo bonus for bringing me in alive. That means I've gotta deal with people trying to drag me in like a wet dog...hey Bee, you just gonna sit there and puff away in front of me, or are you gonna hook me up?"

Bee groaned, reaching into his vest pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes, along with a small cigarette holder. He lit the cigarette once it was in the holder, handing it to Fu, "If you didn't get so damn pissy when you don't have these, I swear I'd cut you off."

"For a girl who's chained to your wrist, she sure seems to have a lot of control over you," Naruto remarked, deciding that if the two of them were going to smoke, he would too. Lighting the unsmoked half of his cigar, he continued, "You don't seem afraid to smack the shit out of her though, so I guess there's that. Hold up, I just remembered something!"

Both of the other passengers jumped at his excitement, "What's that?'

"Bee, you never told me how you got your nickname," Naruto recalled, "You promised during the last battle of the war that if we made it out alive, you'd tell me. Don't tell me you're gonna break your promise."

The man relaxed a bit at this, "Is that all? Nah, I'll keep my promise if you keep yours. You still got the letter?'

Naruto padded his shirt pocket, "Of course I've got it. I never leave home without this thing!"

"What letter?" Fu asked, cutting into the conversation, "And what war are guys even talking about? There hasn't been a war between the villages in what, 30 years?"

A common misconception, but far from the truth, as Naruto soon explained, "There's always some kinda war going on around here, whether you know it or not. The one we're talking about was short though, barely lasting six months, but boy oh boy, was it bloody!"

Bee continued for him, "Got that right. A new village was popping up, calling themselves the Hidden Sound, who were trying to recruit rouge soldiers and criminals to start up a military dictatorship. To make a long story short, the major villages didn't like it, so they started a militia made up of any volunteers from any of the villages. Me and Naruto both get paid to kill people as it is, so we figured why not? Those Sound bastards were tough, but we made through with only a couple of scars."

"Too bad," Fu scoffed, earning a scowl from both assassins, "If they'd killed you, then I wouldn't be in this mess."

Naruto couldn't resist, "And I never would've gotten to meet you. Guess we both would've lucked out."

That got Bee laughing, "Haha, how do you like them bells, bitch? They sound real pretty to me. Nice one Uzumaki. So, you gonna let me see that letter or what?"

"Sure, as long as you don't do any damage to it. I lost the other ones," Naruto said, pulling an envelope out of pocket of the thin coat he was wearing and handing it to Bee, "Careful, I don't take it out of the envelope much."

Fu eyed the papers as Bee took them out the envelope, "Hold on, you never told me who it's from."

"There may have been a reason for that," Naruto growled, taking the last puff from his cigar, "If you must know, it's from the beginning once head of the Hidden Leaf village, the great Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi."

Hiruzen Sarutobi was a living legend; one of the few people still alive who'd met the first set of Kage's who'd founded the Hidden Villages. Fu raised an eyebrow when Naruto so much as mentioned the name, "Bullshit. Why would the Third Hokage be sending a damn Uzumaki a letter?"

Being called a lair was not something Naruto took lightly, "Most of my childhood was spent in the Hidden Leaf, and for whatever reason, he took an interest in me. Probably because I was getting in trouble all the time so he had to scold a lot. Eventually, we ended up as friends, and even after I left the Leaf to become an assassin, we'd still communicate through letters and stuff. I lost most of them in fire last year, but that one was saved since I always keep it on me. It's my favorite out of all of them."

"'May the Will of Fire continued to burn within you'...boy, that line gets me," Bee said, reading the last line of letter out loud, "How many of these were there?"

Naruto couldn't even remember, "A lot, to say the least. I really wish that wasn't the only one left. He passed away about six months ago."

Both of the other passengers watched as Naruto got quite all of sudden, his mood turning introspective, "I miss the old bastard...can't believe he's gone."

"Sorry bro, I hadn't heard he died," Bee apologized, turning to Fu, "Did you hear that? One of the last great leaders is gone, and we're sitting in front of his freaking pen pal! What do you think about that?"

Fu didn't respond. She looked the letter up and down, unimpressed. With a snort, she hawked a wad of spit onto the front page, shocking everyone in the wagon. Naruto's eyes shot wide, and he instantly jetted out his fist, punching Fu directly in the jaw. The momentum sent her flying into the door, smashing it open and sending her rolling onto the ground. Thanks to the chain on her wrist, Bee went flying out with her, screaming as he did, "Ah, fuck!"

Slamming on the roof wagon, Naruto started screaming, "Han, hold up! We lost a couple passengers!"

"Woah boys," Han could be heard outside as he jerked on the reins of the horses. With the wagon halted, Naruto jumped out and ran towards Bee and Fu, who were lying on the ground.

Bee held onto his arm for dear life, "Son of a bitch Naruto, what are you trying to do? Rip off my damn arm?"

Leaping a bit passed the two sandy individuals to grab his letter, which was about to blow away, Naruto yelled back, "Hey, I didn't tell you to shove my letter in her face! You know how much this thing means to me!"

"You almost broke my jaw, you fucker," Fu said, spitting some blood from her mouth, "Is that how Uzumaki's treat their lady's?"

Naruto kicked sand in Fu's face, growling, "No, but you ain't a lady now are ya?"

Looking over the letter, he heard Bee called over, "Is it alright?"

"Lucky for her, she didn't do too much damage to it," Naruto replied, folding it up and returning it to his pocket, "If she had ruined it, I probably would've killed her."

Bee didn't seem to hate that idea, "As long as you paid me the extra 50,000 ryos, I would've let ya. Come on, let's forget all this and get back in the wagon. Once we're getting away from the storm, I'll tell ya how I got my nickname."

That would've been fine, but when Naruto looked over that the wagon, he saw Han had his shotgun out and cocked, "Um, Bee, we might have a problem."

"Oh for shit's sake, what now?" Bee asked, yanking his prisoner with him as he walked towards his driver, "This day keeps getting better and better."

As the group grew closer to Han, they could hear a raspy male voice explaining himself, "My name is Gaara, from the Hidden Sand. I'm the new Kazekage, and I was hoping to get a ride with you, and whoever it is you're carrying, to somewhere safe where I can stay."

Once this new man was visible, they saw a man who looked to be in his twenties, with a thin build, and red hair, topped of with the symbol for 'Love' tattooed on his forehead. Han didn't seem to buy that he was a Kage, "You're the new leader of the Hidden Sand? Why are you way out in the middle of nowhere?"

"I like to take walks," The young man responded, looking out at the terrain around them, "The silence and wind on my face are good for clearing my head. Sometimes, I lose track of time. I really can get lost out here…"

By now the entire group was in front of Gaara, all asking in unison, "In the desert?"

"Yes."

Bee shook his head and spun around, "As if we'd buy that. Look buddy, we've got work to do, so go and try your con act on somebody else."

None of that passenger's argued, with Naruto seeming to outright agree, "You'd better hurry and find someplace to hunker down in Mr. 'Kazekage.' That sandstorms coming on fast."

"Mr. Driver," Gaara called, causing them all to look back, "Would you please confirm for me that you just heard me tell them that I'm the Sand Village's Kazekage and that I required a ride?"

Han had no idea where he was going with this, "Yes, I heard you. What of it?"

"It's just that, based on those bodies on roof, it would seem that you're transporting assassins," Gaara went on, his voice never changing an octave, "That would mean you're likely going to end up in the Hidden Sand soon so that they can get paid. When you arrive in the Hidden Sand, I expect you to tell the officials there that I was left to die out here by these assassins, which I can assure you, will result in them being executed. Do I make myself clear?"

Instead of Han, it was Bee who responded, "You lying little bastard. I'll bet every ryo this bitch is worth that this isn't even the first time you've pulled this trick!"

Gaara showed no sign of being offended by his words, "I don't know for certain how much the young lady is worth, but you'd lose those ryos. Believe what you want, but I am the Kazekage of the Hidden Sand, and you'll end up dead if you leave me out here."

"Hate to say it Bee, since I don't believe him anymore than you do, but he's kinda got us backed into a corner," Naruto reasoned, "We've got the room, so we may as well play it safe, right?"

This whole situation had Bee wanting to yank out his hair. He mulled it over for a moment, then addressed their new companion, "You got any weapons on you, Gaara?"

Gaara pointed to his belt, which had a small holster with a compartment for throwing knives and one for a revolver, "Just these, and they're staying on me. I won't go unprotected."

"If that's true, then you'll have to wear handcuffs," Bee said, grabbing a pair from his pocket, "Cause lord knows I don't trust you."

That wasn't happening if Gaara had anything to say about it, "As I said, I'm the leader of my village. I will not enter it in chains."

Bee was about to tell him that he'd die if he didn't before remembering why he was in this situation in the first place. He looked at Naruto, then to Han, nodding mostly to himself, "Han, give Naruto back his iron. Uzumaki, if you help me defend my ryos, I'll help you defend yours. I suppose if I have to trust somebody, an old war bro ain't a bad choice."

"Hey, I'm not gonna complain about being armed again," Naruto said with a shrug, grabbing his various weapons from the driver, "I'll keep the barrel of gun right on Gaara until we get to whatever shop we're staying at."

It seemed Gaara could live with that, because he began to walk to the wagon, "Glad we got all that sorted out. Shall we continue on our little journey then?"

"Oh great, another asshole for us to ride with," Fu complained as she was dragged by Bee back into the wagon, "Are we sure we'll have enough room for you guys to keep you dick measuring competition going?"

* * *

The wagon had become tight on space and high on tension. Naruto was true to his word, with his revolver pointing directly to Gaara's temple in case he decide to try anything funny. Fu grumbled until Bee lit her another cigarette for no other reason than to shut her up. It was silent in the wagon for some time, until Naruto finally grew bored of it and asked, "So Killer Bee, you gonna tell me how you got that nickname, or what?"

Bee was off in his little world at the moment, "Hm? Ah, the nickname. Right, I still haven't told you about that. Well, you know what my real name is, don't ya?"

"It's Kirabi, right?" Naruto asked, which Bee nodded to confirm, "Okay, so they just turned Kirabi into Killer Bee because they sound the same?"

That was only a small part of it, "Yes and no. My adoptive brother is the head of the Hidden Cloud, the Raikage they call it up there. Me and him were a team of assassin's before he took the job. They called us the A-B assassin team, since his name was actually A, and my name has B right in it. Our father wasn't a real creative guy. Well, after he took the job, I kept being an assassin, but I needed a new title. B didn't make much sense all by itself, so I added something to it. Killer Bee sounds like Kirabi, and it wasn't that big of a change to my old name. So, just like that, I became the mighty Killer Bee."

Naruto thought it was a pretty neat story, but they soon discovered their female passenger didn't, "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. The name's not even scary. Makes you sound more silly than threatening."

"You think so?" Bee asked, quickly following the question up with a swift elbow strike to Fu's nose, making the woman cry out in pain, "Well I think you should shut hell up!"

It looked like Fu was fighting not to reach over and strangle her captor. While Bee waited for some kind of response, she just stared, shaking in anger. Then, out of the clear blue, she smiled, and began to laugh. It was a small, sinister laugh that chilled the bones of every other passenger. She wiped the blood from her face and turned to look out the window, still smiling all the time.

Gaara was the first to shrug it off, "Naruto, I thought I heard Bee refer to you as an Uzumaki earlier. So, are you one of the final remaining members of that once proud bloodline?"

"As far as I know, I'm the last Uzumaki," Naruto replied, a tad off put by the way he'd phrased the question, "Can you speak like a normal person please?"

The manner in which he spoke was far from Gaara's mind at that moment, "I see, and are these two aware of the history surrounding you family?"

Naruto could see Bee raised an eyebrow, while Fu said nothing, "I think she has an idea, but Bee, I honestly don't know if he does or not."

"If you're talking about your whole clan being slaughter, I already know," Bee remarked, "Hell, who didn't hear about that?"

Fu piped in, not even bothering to look at them, "He's not talking about that, he's talking about why they got killed off and why anyone who knows much about them won't trust them."

This part of the story Bee had never gotten before, so Naruto elaborated for him, "You know how I've got these whisker marks on cheeks? That's actually a sort of tattoo all Uzumaki's are given at birth. Our clan once worshiped the great Kyuubi Kitsune, a god associated with trickery and intelligence. By the time I was born, that had passed, but most of the traditions that came with it were still going strong. There's a whole legend people tell about it."

"That's cool and all, but what does it have to do with your clan being untrusted and killed off?" Bee puzzled, as he was interested in the story, but more interested in the results.

Naruto continued, "I'm getting to that, it all has to do with the legend. This next part I know is true. At one point, hundreds of years ago, the Uzumaki's had a massive fortune in the form of various treasures, mostly made of precious metals and gems. Lots of people coveted that treasure, and ransacked the clan to get at it. Over the following decade, the clan waged wars and a had a few assassination planned out to get their treasure back. A rumor got started that worshiping the Kyuubi gave them dark powers, and people were superstitious back then, so it stuck. People who still remember the myth hate the Uzumaki clan to this day, even though they were doing nothing but taking back what was rightfully theirs."

"That's one way to look at," Fu said through her teeth, "Another way is that all you Uzumaki's are good for is dirty fucking tricks. Back when I still lived in the Hidden Waterfall, we had a couple of Uzumaki's stop by looking for a place to stay. The elder let them in, and those bastards ransacked half the town!"

Though he didn't know for sure that the story was true, Naruto went along with it anyways, "Maybe they did, but that doesn't prove anything about the Uzumaki clan. So we have a few dicks in our clan? Who doesn't?"

Bee was growing tired of these digressions, "Fu, would leave him alone so he can tell the story? I'm getting interested in this."

Naruto waved it off, "It's fine. I won't let her get under my skin. So anyways, after we got all the treasure back, the clan kept ahold of it for a long time, and we made even more money since we had the best place to fish in pretty much the entire world. It took a lot to defend the Uzumaki fortune, but the Uzumaki's love a challange. By the time I was born, my dad was the biggest thing stopping people from trying to take the loot. You might have heard of him, Minato Namikaze."

"Minato Namikaze?" Gaara repeated, his face showing the faintest bit of intrigue, "He came up with war strategies that are still being used in the Hidden Sand. I studied him greatly over the years, and I've seen the few pictures there are of him floating around in the world. I'll admit, you do bare a striking resemblance."

That was something Naruto had been hearing all his life, at least from those who knew his father, "Yeah, I know he was a pretty big deal in certain circles. My Namikaze family members liked him to visit a lot, mostly to try and con him. Thing was though, my dad was best weapon the clan had, so without him, we were left wide open to an attack. Some Hidden Rock villagers knew it too, so they figured out when he'd be gone one day, gathered up a small army, against their leader's orders, and waged war on the Uzumaki's. Without my dad there help figure out a battle plan, they got slaughtered. Almost every Uzumaki was murdered, and they stole everything valuable that wasn't nailed down. My first vivid memory is of my home being burned to the ground and my mother lying on her back with a Rock villager standing over her. My second vivid memory is me holding a bloody knife after stabbing that bastard to death."

Bee let loose a low whistle, "Damn kid, you had it rough. How the hell do ya bounce back from that?"

"You move to the Hidden Leaf and learn to kill people for money," Naruto answered, having played the entire thing through in his head dozens of times, "My mother barely survived and my dad got back before the thieves got everything. He killed what Rock villagers were still there, split up what was left of fortune with the survivors, and we moved to the new village. Like I said, I got into the some trouble there, but mostly kept my head down until I got the chance to move away. The real trouble I got into though, came after my dad was about to be named the new Hokage. Right before that could happen, he mysteriously died, vomiting blood. He was poisoned, along with my mother. They couldn't prove it, but I knew it was the no good Namikaze side of the family. Reason they did it was so that they would have control of me and take what they could of our share of the treasure. Most of it was sold off, but I hid a few things away so they couldn't get to them. Once I got old enough though, I got my revenge on those bastards! I trained so hard that by the time I was ready, they never knew what hit them. Killed all of them without much trouble. Most of villagers wanted me executed for it, but the Third managed to find some obscure law that made it so I only got banished. So I left, and I was hoping there might be a few more Uzumaki's out there for me to see once I did, but I didn't find so much as a cousin."

That didn't seem to break Fu's heart, "Good, let them die out. Bunch of worthless, backstabbing, no good-"

Naruto turned his revolver away from Gaara and pointed it at Fu, who promptly shut up. The supposed Kazekage told her, "Not that I want that gun pointed back at me, but you may want consider shutting your mouth before our friend here shoots it off."

"The man's got point," Bee said, more concerned about his money than he was about the girl, "How about you stop with the social commentary for now?"

There was plenty more that Fu wanted to say, but she didn't feel it would be worth the trouble. She rested her head in her hand and leaned on the window, looking at the raging sandstorm that would soon be upon them. The rest of the ride went by in silence, with only the howling of the oncoming winds to fill their eardrums.

* * *

The only place for miles around that had could provide them with any amount of shelter was a small shop owned by the one time Leaf villager by the name of Teuchi. He'd made the best ramen in the Hidden Leaf, but found himself less than fond of those who lived there. So, he set up shop in a location that was smack dab in the middle of the route between the Sand and the Leaf, creating a place where weary travelers could stop in, get some food and drink, and rest for awhile. Since it was virtually the only place for people to stop in the desert, he did well for himself. Teuchi's Tavern, as it was called, was currently where Han was pulling the wagon filled with colorful passengers into.

"Woah," Han called to the horses, pulling hard on reins. As he brought the wagon to a stop, he saw a blonde haired woman with dark eyes exit the shop, "Good afternoon madam. Is Teuchi in there? We need to talk with him about staying here until the sandstorm passes over."

Catching a glimpse of the wagon full of people, the woman responded, "Teuchi doesn't own this place anymore. He sold it me about a week ago. My name's Yugito, and this is my place now."

Naruto poked his head out of the wagon window, "Teuchi sold this place? Really? I figured he'd take it with him to his grave."

"Well he didn't," Yugito fired back, "I don't really care why, all I know is he didn't want it anymore, so I scooped it up. What've you got, five people in total? Hm...it'll be tighter than I'd like, but I think we have just enough room for you guys in there. There's a barn behind this place for you to put the horses away in, but you probably already knew that if you've stopped here before. Hey, what's that big lump on roof?"

The following response from Naruto was a blunt one, "Dead bodies. I'm an assassin, bringing them in for a payday. Don't worry, they won't hurt anybody."

Yugito turned back to the shop, "Whatever. Get the horses stored in the barn and get in here. I don't need that sandstorm to hit while I'm waiting for your dumbasses."

"Teuchi would usually help you get the horses in the barn," Naruto replied, making Yugito glance at him with narrowed eyes, "I'm just saying."

She continued walking back in the shop, "Well I'm not Teuchi. If want help with the horses, get one of your passenger to do it."

Han thought carefully, as he trusted only a small group of people with his prize horses. Bee had Fu chained to him, and Gaara was still an unknown, but Naruto had been relatively straightforward with him so far. Plus, he needed to store his bodies anyways, "Naruto, let these other guys get off and then help me out with the horses. Then I'll help you move the stiffs up top. Deal?"

"Sounds fair to me," Naruto replied, climbing out of the wagon and walking up front to sit with Han, "Between the two of us, it shouldn't take too long."

Bee and Gaara both jumped out, dragging Fu with them, and allowed Han and Naruto to head off to the barn. The group turned and entered the tavern, eager to at last be somewhere safe. It wouldn't be long now before the sandstorm was upon them.

* * *

As the travelers were entering the tavern they were unaware that they were being watched. A lone figure laid on the crest of a sand dune a ways away, silently looking through a telescope. Just as silently another person creeped beside the first and asked, "Are we ready to go?"

The first person shook their head, "Not yet, the wagon just got there. It'll be awhile before we strike. Looks like they've got some extra passengers too. We might hav eto make some changes."

The second figure nodded, accepting the answer, "I'm sure we'll figure it out." A moment passed, then, looking at the approaching sandstorm, they commented, "We're probably going to need to sit tight in the tent for a while anyway."

"Great, just what I need. To be stuck in an enclosed space with the rookie and the rich bitch."

"Oh calm down Mr. Grumpy pants, if you behave I'll give you a treat."

The first person turned to the second with a deadpan expression, "You know once we free the boss we're going to have to be much more desecrate about everything."

This seemed to sadden the companion as they asked, "You mean we're going to have to stop, don't you?"

In response, the first person smirked and replied, "Now I never said that..."

* * *

"Looks more like a shack than a tavern," Gaara remarked as he walked inside, "Though I must admit, it does have a sort of homey feel to it."

The building was decently sized, likely just big enough to give everyone there a tiny bit of breathing room, and made entirely out of wood. There was a bar on the left wall, with a wall of liquor behind it, along with a stove that currently had a pot boiling away on it. A community table that could seat about ten people was just off center, neatly tucked away by the fire. By said fireplace was a table with a shogi board on it with a chair on each side. Sitting in those chairs, playing a game together, was a man in his late forties with red hair and beard on the right, and a young man who looked to be eighteen with messy grey hair and scar down his right eye on the left. Finally, tucked away against the wall were two beds, one of which had a black haired man in his twenties laying in it, a flute next to him.

Bee walked up to the two men playing shogi, Fu close behind him, and introduced himself, "My name's Bee, and this tramp behind me is my prisoner, Fu. You can talk to me, but don't talk to her. I don't like staying under a roof with people I don't know, and I don't know you two, so...who are ya?"

"My name's Roshi," The man with a the large beard said, "And you sir, are a vulture. Killer Bee, I've heard of you! You pick bones off the flesh of society and profit from it. Leave me alone. I have no desire to talk to you."

That was just fine with Bee, "Fair enough. What about you, with the scar? What do they call ya bro?"

"Well, it certainly isn't 'bro, I can tell you that much," The young man grumbled, moving one of his pieces, "My name is Yagura, I'm from the Hidden Mist village. I'm supposed to deliver a message to some shopkeeper in the Hidden Sand. It's boring as hell since I'm stuck in this storm. Since Roshi was so rude, I'll tell you about him myself. He was from the Hidden Rock as part of their military, but got kicked out for disobeying orders and tearing apart some village. Whoever the guy on the bed is, he's still sleeping. We thought it'd be impolite to wake him up."

Fu wasn't too concerned about that, "Hey, fucker with the flute, wake up!"

The 'fucker with the flute' slowly opened his eyes and sat up, stretching a bit before saying with a yawn, "I'm up. Did someone want me to play a song or something?"

"Not exactly," Bee replied, walking up to him, "My name is Bee, I was just introducing myself to everyone. I don't like being around a bunch of strangers."

A nod came from the man, "Understandable my man, understandable indeed. The name's Utakata, and I am an entertainer. I've played this flute in every great village in the world! My business is music and my muse is life itself! So, who's that pretty young thing behind you, hm?"

"Her name is Fu, and you only think she's pretty because she hasn't opened her mouth," Be responded, earning yet another glare from the girl, "She's my prisoner."

Utakata frowned, "Prisoner? My oh my, isn't that dreadful? A pretty girl like you, off to the gallows. Perhaps I'll write a melody for it. Is it just you and your 'prisoner' here?"

Bee shook his head, "Nope, we've got a few others traveling with us. My driver, Han, is out in the barn along with a bro of mine named Naruto. Gaara's around here somewhere."

"Well, that's more people than I ever figured would show up in a place like this," Utakata commented, lying back down, "Oh well, I suppose I'll have to be talented enough to entertain all of you."

When he finished speaking, Naruto and Han entered the establishment, the sand on their shoulders indicating that storm had just arrived. Naruto pushed the door behind them closed, but when he reached for a latch to lock it with, he found it was busted off, "Who the hell busted this? It'd be fine if there wasn't any wind, but we've got fucking storm coming! No way is this gonna hold up against that!"

Han saw a hammer, some boards, and some nails in a bucket against the wall only a few feet away, so ran over and grabbed them, returning to nail the door shut, "There, it should close quite nicely now. So then, I don't know about you, but I need something to drink that has a little bite to it."

"I might get something like that in a bit," Naruto remarked, looking around the room at the eight others who were staying there, "Nine people locked away together in this tavern? Oh boy, won't this be fun…


	2. Checkmate

Now, my wonderful readers, is when we jump right back into The Nefarious Nine. So glad to see everyone enjoyed the first chapter, and now that the characters have been set up, we can jump right into the tension and mystery. All Nine of the strangers are locked together with a sandstorm keeping them trapped inside the shop. Who among the group isn't who they say they are? Is there anyone in the group whose admitting their true intentions? I suppose the only way to find out is keep on reading, isn't it? This chapter will be a bit shorter than the last one, but only because I'm stopping at a point that feels natural within the terms of the story. Also the last chapter was rather long winded due to everything I had to set up. Thank you all so much for reading and be certain to review.

Chapter Soundtrack: The Handsome Family-Weightless Again

* * *

Naruto had worked all his life to learn how to read a person's face, and he'd like to think he was better at it than most. Yet, as he looked around a room of primarily strangers, he felt uncertain of what to think of any of them. Fu, for instance, seemed oddly calm for a woman who was on her way to be tried for murder. Gaara, on the other hand, was squirmy as could be, but that could've simply been because he wasn't much of people person. Being stuck with eight strangers was likely less than fun for him. For now, Naruto would keep his hand near his weapon and continue to observe his new 'friends,' hopeful that none of them would be foolish.

A small glass of brandy in his hand, Naruto leaned on the bar and watched Yugito stir the pot of ramen, taking a small sip before asking, "So, you're a chef huh? Made that ramen yourself and everything?"

"No, I found it on the table when I walked in and just thought it looked good," Yugito snapped, "Who in the hell else would've made broth in my shop?"

Naruto shrugged, grabbing the brandy bottle and pouring a little more, "It was only a question. Ramen is my favorite food, so I was hoping it was homemade., Where'd you say you were from?"

The blonde woman turned and smacked her spoon on the counter, "The Hidden Cloud! Any more random questions you need to ask me?"

"The Hidden Cloud? Interesting," Naruto commented, Yugito's anger meaning nothing to him, "Got a few people smoking in here. I don't think Teuchi ever would've allowed that."

Yugito was grinding her teeth at this point, "That was when owned the shop. I own it now, and if people wanna fucking smoke, I'm not gonna tell them no! Now, would you please leave me alone so that I can finish your dinner? Oh, and by the way, I'm keeping track of how much you drinking, and I expect you to pay up before you leave."

Gulping down what was left in his glass, Naruto set down his brandy and said with a smile, "With customers service like this, I'm happy to pay however much you want. Good luck with the food."

"Hold on a second," Naruto heard a gruff voice call from across the room, "Blondie, come over here so that I can get a good look at you."

Naruto wasn't a fan of being called anything but his actual name. He walked over to Roshi, who seemed to be the one who called him, growling, "The name is Naruto, and you...look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?"

"Those whisker's on your face, those are Uzumaki marks, aren't they?" Roshi asked through his teeth, "I thought we took care of all you bastards years ago. I guess we missed a couple."

That was when it hit Naruto who this guy was to him, saying in a low, dangerous tone, "You're from the Hidden Rock, aren't you? I don't remember much from when I was little, but the faces of the bastards who tore apart the Hidden Whirlpool I can recall pretty clearly."

Roshi stood up, walking tall and proud as he declared, "Yes sir, I was in the Hidden Whirlpool, and I helped them burn it to ground! That place needed to be cleansed of you demon worshipping bastards! I was forced out my village for it, but god was it worth it! All you greedy fuckers ever did was make the world a worse place! It makes me sick to even know that even one of you is still walking around on this earth!"

"I only got to kill one of you back then," Naruto said with a deadly glare as he reached down for his gun, "It's nice to know I'll get to take out one more of you before the day is over."

The ex-Rock resident was about to get shot in the chest, but Utakata jumped in between the two of them before Naruto could pull the trigger, "Hold on gentlemen! I know there must still be some bad blood between the two of you, or at least it sounds that way, but I feel I must remind you that you aren't the only ones here. We've got witnesses with us, Mr. Uzumaki, and if you shoot the unarmed Roshi, that will be considered murder. If you murder him, you will be tried, and most likely put to death. Ask yourself; is some silly grudge really worth killing this fool over?"

Naruto's desired reaction was to say that it was more than worth it and pull the trigger. However, he ended pulling his hand away from his gun, thinking a little further ahead, "I'll play nice for now, assuming that he does."

"If the Uzumaki says he can stay calm, then so can I," Roshi fired back, returning to his chair, "I've got my eye on you boy."

A middle finger was the only response he got from Naruto. The man walked over to the table on the side of the room and sat down next to Bee, who was smoking his pipe while keeping a close eye on Fu, "So, he was one of the guys who tore up your village, huh? Small fuckin' world."

Naruto took out another cigar for himself, lighting up as quickly as he could, "You have no idea. I'm gonna need a hell of a lot more brandy before this night's over. How's things going with the prisoner?"

"As long as I've got these on me, they'll go just fine," Bee replied, motioning to the eight short blades hooked to his belt, "She's tried to grab em' more than a couple of times, but she's learning real quick how fast my reflexes are. How do you think she got that black eye?"

Fu gave Bee a dirty look, then started to fidget with the chain on her wrist, "As long as we're stuck in here, can I take these damn things off? It's not like I'm going anywhere."

Taking out one of the blades mentioned before, Bee brought the pointed end to Fu's throat and ran it across her smooth skin, "No way in hell am I gonna do that. I still don't fully trust anyone in here, so I want you right by my side at all times. That way, if you or anyone around here tries anything funny, I can slit throat and watch bleed out while I die."

"Well fuck you too," Fu replied bitterly, "Can you at least get me something to eat? I'm gonna starve if you don't feed me soon."

Bee was starting to get pretty hungry himself, "I could for a bite to eat too. That ramen is smelling pretty damn good right about now."

Sitting on the other side of the table was Yagura, who had to agree, "I know, it's making me wanna dig into it already. That cook doesn't look like she cares for being rushed though."

"She doesn't enjoy being questioned, I'll tell ya that much," Naruto replied, still eyeing Roshi from across the room, "Hey Yagura, you were playing shogi with him, right? What all did he tell you?"

Yagura almost opened his mouth, but stopped before he made a sound. Without saying a word, he stood up, walked to the bar, and grabbed a bottle of whisky labeled 'Snake Bite' before returning to the table. Only then did he speak, "Tell ya what; if you agree to pay for my drinks, I'll tell you anything you wanna know about him. That bastard told me his whole life story, and all it's gonna cost you is one bottle of booze."

Without a moment of hesitation, Naruto replied, "Tell Yugito to put it on my tab and start talking."

* * *

"Ugh, it's absolutely dead in here," Roshi complained, looking around the room, "I could go take a nap, that might kill a little time."

Something smacked against the table in front of him as he was thinking, making his eyes shoot foreword to see what it was. Naruto was now sitting in the chair across from him, having just placed a new bottle of Snake Bite in front of Roshi, "Sorry about that, I was just trying to get your attention. You up for a drink and game of shogi?"

Roshi narrowed his eyes and growled, "I don't drink with Uzumaki's, especially when they just got done pointing a gun at me!"

Naruto continued to act normally, "We both said some pretty nasty things to one another, but let's face it, that Whirlpool thing was a long time ago. If we're gonna be stuck in a room together for what could be a matter of days, we should probably try and get along. The booze is a peace offering."

"It's a good one, I'll say that," Roshi said, reaching for the bottle and taking off the top so that he could get a little wiff, "That's high end stuff right there. You've got the right idea, but how do I know you won't shoot my ass while my guards down?"

"A fair question," Naruto conceded, reaching into his holster and carefully pulling out one of his revolvers, offering it to a nervous Roshi handle first, "Tell ya what, I'll let you hold onto one of my guns while we're playing, okay? That way, neither of us will feel disarmed."

After playing it over in his head for a moment, Roshi tentatively took the weapon and set down on the arm of the chair next to him, "Alright, since you bought such a nice bottle, I'll give you a little time. You'd better be ready for me to kick your ass though. Shogi is my game."

Naruto began to set up the piece, "Well, we'll just have to see about that, now won't we?"

"If you don't mind, I think I'll watch," Gaara said, breaking his silence and alerting both players that he was next to them, "You can tell a lot about a person from the way they play a game like this."

Neither men gave a damn if he watched them, so Naruto motioned for Roshi to make the first move. Thus began a half an hour long stretch of careful strategy, with each move taking a noticeably long time to calculate. Before long, Gaara wasn't the only one watching them. One by one, everyone but Yugito gathered around the table to watch the battle of wits. Utakata had begun to play a song that added to the tension of the movements. Gaara started to pick apart their personalities by the way they played, noticing that Naruto was a defensive type who painstaking planned each move, while Roshi was much more aggressive, trying to go straight for the kill, no matter the cost. It was a real sight to behold.

Yugito did eventually join them all, walking over with a bowl of ramen that she sat next to Naruto, "Hate to break up your game, but I need someone to taste test the ramen. Since whiskers here seems to think he's such an expert, I thought he might wanna do the honors."

"Hm, oh sure, just give me one second," Naruto replied, moving his piece before grabbing the bowl and chopsticks that came with it, "Now, let's see what we've got here."

Naruto sniffed the broth for a moment before he brought some noodles up to his mouth, taking his first bite. He took longer than anyone expect to tell Yugito what he thought, and it was hard not to notice the strange way he was looking at her, "Tastes spectacular. I'm sure everyone will love it. Leave bowl here and eat I'll rest when I'm finished. Thanks."

As the young man turned back to the game board, Yugito took a couple steps back, uncertain of the why the interaction had felt so strange. With her gone and Naruto's move complete, Roshi made his strike, and it was one he was beaming with pride for, "Check. Looks like I'm about to beat ya, Uzumaki. Maybe your clan isn't as smart or as good at tricking people as they thought."

"Yeah, maybe not," Naruto responded, taking it rather well that he was so close to defeat, "To be fair, it's our ability to smooth talk people that got us that reputation. You'd be surprised how many people my silver tongue's gotten to over the years."

Roshi didn't see where he was going with this, "Does this story have a point, or are you just trying to delay the inevitable?"

"I'm just saying, I can talk people into just about anything," Naruto boasted, taking another bite of ramen, "Women are the one's I'm the best with though. With them, I use my tongue for more than just talking, if you know what I mean. You keep in touch with your ex-wife, Roshi?"

Without even thinking, he responded, "Who, Kori? She hasn't said much to me since they kicked me out of the Hidden Rock...hold up, how'd you know about her?"

Naruto allowed himself a small smile, "Didn't I tell you? I met her when I was dragging a body into the Hidden Rock a year or so back. Nice lady, real pretty too. Legs that go on for miles and a tight little ass just perfect for grabbing."

"You're a fucking liar," Roshi spat, his face getting red, "I'll bet you just heard me and Yagura talking about it earlier, didn't ya!"

"Maybe I did, but I couldn't have known about her dark hair and onyx eyes, now could I?" Naruto asked, noting that Roshi nearly gasped, "How would explain me knowing that?"

Now the bearded man was starting to sweat, but he wasn't yet convinced, "It's the Hidden Rock, practically everyone has dark hair and onyx eyes. I got made fun of as a kid for being the only redhead in hundred miles of the village. You never met my wife."

"Ex-wife," Naruto reminded him, "She made sure she was clear about that. All she could talk about was how selfish you were, leaving your son without a father to go off and kill some people who didn't do anything to you."

Roshi was sweating at this point. He couldn't remember if he'd told Yagura about his son or not, "I...she wouldn't say that...Kori loved me."

Taking another bite of his ramen, Naruto kept his story going as he ate, "She used to, before you showed your true colors to her. What can I say, people admit a lot of stuff when they're drunk. They get pretty grabby too…"

"You got her drunk?" Roshi asked in terror, before shaking himself out of it, "What am I saying? You never even met her!"

Naruto acted like he couldn't hear him, "I met Kori in a bar after I got my pay, the poor thing drinking her sorrows away. She didn't have much in the way of money with only one source of income. It was starting to look like she was going to have to sell her body on the street just to get by. Me, being the kind soul that I am, told her she didn't have to do that. I gave Kori a little money, no strings attached of course, to make sure such a pretty woman wouldn't stoop that low. Next thing I knew, after I walked her home, she was dragging me into her bedroom and kissing my neck."

Roshi shot out of his seat and screamed, "You shut your fucking mouth!"

"Are you sure? It's a pretty good story," Naruto continued bragging, "I mean, when I got her clothes off and saw the body I got to work with, I almost blew it right there. There wasn't a centimeter of her body that I didn't caress or run my tongue over. Boy, did my mouth just have that girl _screaming_!"

No one in the room could believe what they were hearing. The story had Roshi shaking with rage, "If you don't shut your damn mouth, I swear I'm going to,"

He didn't get to finish that sentence, "Speaking of shutting mouths, I found a great way to keep her quiet. Well, I wasn't really the one who suggested it, but boy could that woman deep throat. She wasn't gagging or anything. Did she ever do that for you, Roshi? Are did you all you ever get was what we ended with; straight up fucking her right in that tight little pussy of her's?"

"I'm gonna kill you, you son of," Roshi bellowed as he grabbed the revolver from the arm of the chair. It was another sentence that he never got to finish, as Naruto was far quicker on the draw, putting two bullets right in his chest. Blood splattered all around them as Roshi fell back into his chair, dead.

"Don't talk about my mother like that," Naruto growled, spinning the gun around in his hand. Everyone's eyes were on him as he reach down to the Shogi board, moving one final time and ending the game, "Checkmate, Roshi…"

* * *

In a tent behind a hill half a mile away from the shop, the man who'd been watching the passengers through his telescope laid on his back on a small mat, attempting to get some sleep. He knew the odds of him getting any were unlikely with the winds raging outside, but it was worth a shot at least. His 'lady friend' he'd been speaking to on the hill was outside with their prisoner, the rich bitch, leaving him alone in the tent with the rookie. She was a nice kid, but a bit too chatty for his taste. As if to prove his point, she piped up after he said this, "So, what made you decided to join up with the Bloody Waterfall Gang?"

"I had some bad experiences in a war," The man replied, his tone suggesting he didn't wish to speak about anything at the moment.

The rookie didn't seem to understand, "War huh? That must've been rough. Me, mine was more of 'lover's scorned' kinda situation. I found out my fiance was sleeping with another woman. I blinded his ass, but it got me chased out of my old village. Didn't get to the bitch he was sleeping with either…"

With a sigh, the more seasoned gang member looked up, "Can you please do me a favor?"

"Yeah."

"Shut up," He replied, surprising the rookie with his bluntness, "Unless you're telling me this because you're looking for a rebound fuck, I don't really care."

That remark was enough to make the girl go silent. The man in front of her may have been a hound dog, but he was still above her in rank. Not to mention he was a damn deadly sniper. Even if she could've taken him out, the boss would've killed her for ruining her plaything. For now the rookie would remain quiet, focusing on the matter at hand. She had only just gotten to join this gang. Now was the time to make sure it didn't vanish before she got to reap its benefits.

* * *

 _After a vigorous debate, everyone was eventually able to agree that what Naruto had done broke no laws, and that there no reason to turn him into the authorities after the storm passed. The fact that no one liked Roshi made the decision a little easier. Those who were watching the murder though, missed something rather interesting. While the shootout went down, only Fu noticed that someone slipped away from the rest of group with a vile in their hands. She watched them walk to the pot of ramen and pour the contents of that vile inside, well aware of what it was. Yes indeed, someone had poisoned the ramen..._

* * *

With things at last having calmed down, partially because they unboarded the door and threw Roshi's body outside, Naruto was now lying on the bed to get a little rest. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Han and noticed the stock of the larger man's shotgun sticking out of the holster on his back. He called over the driver and motioned him over, "Hey, Han, that's a nice piece you got there. Mind if I take a look?"

Heading over, Han replied in his rough voice "Only if you let me hold on to your iron's, I'd rather not be unarmed."

Wordlessly, the two assassin simultaneously drew both his revolvers before offering them to the larger man butt first. Equally as silent, the larger man accepted the guns before stuffing them in his belt, then reaching around his back and offering his shotgun to Naruto.

The young man accepted the weapon before examining it closely, noting the quality of the wooden stock and metal barrel. Noticing a second trigger further down the stock of the weapon not connected to the firing mechanism only made his curiosity grow. After making sure no one was in front of the barrel, Naruto pulled the second trigger, jumping when two axe blades popped out near the butt of the weapon. Once his heart calmed down, Naruto examined the blades, again noting their high quality and smiling at seeing a familiar marking.

After pulling the trigger again to store the blades, Naruto returned Han's shotgun, the driver then returning the assassin his revolvers, "Hattori Hanzo hasn't lost his touch."

Although hard to see under his hat, Han raised an eyebrow and asked, "You're familiar with his work?"

Naruto holstered his own guns and replied, "I commissioned something from him a few years back," The assassin paused to pat something near his lower back, although it was hidden by his vest, "It's gotten me out of quite a few tight jams. You try out the ramen yet?"

"No, not yet," Han said with a shrug, "I'm right about to go get myself a bowl. Looks like Bee's finally about to feed his prisoner."

Sitting up to see for himself, the blonde saw that he was right. Bee was pouring himself and Fu each a bowl of ramen. Once he had them in hand, he walked over to the table and sat down, setting one bowl in front of each of them. The last thing Bee did was reach into his pocket and pull out a key, showing it to Fu, "Since I don't feel like jerking you around while I'm trying to eat, I'll take off your cuffs, just for now. Try to get out that seat, and I'll cut you up so bad, they'll have to re-assemble you just so I can get my money. Got it?"

"I have it, dumbass," Fu said, looking down at the ramen before pushing it away, "It's pretty hot, and I want be unchained from you as long as possible. I'm not so hungry that I can't wait a second."

"Whatever floats your boat," Bee replied, splitting his chopsticks and letting the aroma of the broth take him, "Damn, this really does smell good."

As Bee was about to take his first bite, Utakata sat down at the table, his flute in hand, "You two mind if I play a little music? Dinner and a show, as it were."

Music was fine with Bee, "Sure, play whatever ya like. Just let me eat and leave me be from your bullshit."

"Excellent, I think you'll enjoy this little number," Utakata said, bringing his flute up to his lips and starting to play. It was a slow, somber song, but pleasant enough on the ears.

Bee leaned back down to take his bite, but stopped when Han sat down across from him, having gotten a bowl of his own. He stuck his finger in the broth, pulling it back out instantly, "Shit, that's hot! Bee, are you really gonna try and eat it like that?"

"I'm so hungry, I'd shove a fire in my mouth if I thought it'd fill me up," Bee replied, at last taking his bite a gulping it down. He gave a deep sigh of relief as the warm liquid ran down his throat, "Ah man, that is good! Yugito, you really know how to cook!"

The woman waved briefly as a sort of thank you, watching carefully as Bee took every bite. Fu had knowing smile on her face the entire time. As if she didn't have a care in the world, Fu began to sway to the music, starting to sing in a voice that was oddly soothing, "~We came down the black dirt hill~between the rows of blooming peaches~And we scattered leaping fawns~as we fell into the ditches~Ahead of me ran Jackson~who took a bullet to the chest~And beneath the swaying peaches~Jackson slowly bled to death~"

Bee was surprised at how much he enjoyed her music, "You're not too bad at singing, Fu, borderline good I'd say. Songs kinda pretty too. You gonna sing some more?"

"Yeah, I will," Fu said, getting more giddy with every noodle he slurped, "~But as his green eyes dimmed~I saw a fiery mist~drift softly to the clouds~from between his cold blue lips~Now my eyes were open~I stood up between the guns~I saw trails of smoke and fire~flying everywhere I looked~"

"I think I've heard that tune a couple of times," Han recalled bringing his ramen up to his lips, "It's an old war song or something like that."

Han was mid-bite when Bee opened his mouth to reply, but no words left his lips. Instead, he let out a loud cough, spraying blood across the table. Bee was confused for a second before he looked down at the ramen and rasped in realization, "P-poison…"

Those words made Han throw his bowl off to the side, as he could tell by Fu's smile that the bounty hunter was right. Everyone watched in horror as Bee hacked up another blotch of blood, his prisoner giggling the entire time, "Hey Bee? Do me favor when you meet the Shinigami, okay? Tell him I sent ya!"

"You littl-le c-cunt," Bee rasped out, reaching out to strangle Fu.

"What, you think that's the worst thing anyone's ever called me?" Fu asked, snatching of the Bee's blades, able to now that the poison had taken effect, "I've killed people for less than name calling."

She frantically started stabbing Bee in the chest, crimson spraying everywhere on her. More blood covered Fu when Bee coughed directly onto her face. The bounty hunter wobbled for a moment after she finally stopped, falling to the floor with a thud. Fu smiled down victoriously before she felt a gun pressed to the back of her head and heard Naruto growling at her slowly, "I'm only gonna say this once...put...the knife...down!"

Fu shot him an icy glance, but did as he said. Once she was unarmed, he grabbed the chain Bee had been using and put it back on her wrist, then placed the other side of it on his friend's corpse, "That is to make sure that you don't try to run. Bee was over two hundred pounds of pure muscle, so there's no way you'll get out of here without us knowing. Not to mention your fucked up leg."

"What fucked up leg?" Fu asked right before Naruto shot her in the foot, making her scream out in pain, "Ahhhhhh! You're gonna pay for that one asshole!"

Naruto shrugged and called to the man who'd driven them, "Han, come over here please."

"Glad to see someone's taking charge of this," Han remarked, walking next to Naruto while everyone else in the room remained in shock, "You need something from me?"

Naruto's eyes never left Fu as he said, "I want you to take out your gun and point both barrells at this bitch. If anyone some much as winks at her in a funny way, blow her damn brains out. Think you can handle that?"

"With ease," Han replied, taking out his shotgun and cocking it. It was soon trained directly on Fu's head, "This may not be the best time to ask this, but, seeing as someone just poisoned our dinner, isn't kind of an odd time to trust me?"

Normally, he'd be right, but Naruto had his reasons, "Whoever poisoned that ramen is working with her, so they knew better than to eat it. You almost took a bite, which would've killed ya. Right now, you're the only person in this whole place that I trust, which means…"

Naruto pointed his revolver to the sky and fired a shot into the air, making everyone jump, "All of you, get on that fucking wall right now! I want you hands glued to it, and your legs spread apart! If you move in a way I don't like, you'll get a bullet! If you take too long, you'll get a bullet! If you talk back, you'll get a bullet! Basically, guess what's gonna happen if you do anything to piss me off? That's right! You'll get a bullet! Now fucking move!"

"Whatever you want," Utakata said with a nervous chuckle, "Just stay calm, alright?"

"You say something, flute boy?" Naruto asked, making the dark haired man run over to the wall the assassin had be pointing to without another word. Before long, the other three remaining strangers walked over to the wall with him, doing just as Naruto had said, "There you go. Now, I'm going to come over there and frisk you people to see if you've got any weapons on you. Once I've got everything, I'll throw it in a bucket or something like that, and throw everything outside. Anyone got a problem with that?"

Yugito was the only one who seemed to take issue, "Hell no! You are not frisking me! I'm not gonna let some guy that I barely even know starting touching me like that! I'll bet you just wanted an excuse to grab my boobs and my ass!"

That complaint may have worked on some people, but Naruto wasn't one of them, "I'm patting you down for half a second to see if you've got a gun, it's not like I'm gonna grope you. A woman can fire a trigger just as well as a man can, so I've gotta do what I've gotta do."

"Tch, fine," Yugito said, spreading her legs and raises her arms above her head, "Let's get this over with."

Naruto walked over and, true to his word, didn't get too handsy while he searched her. He he got to her ankle and found a small pistol only capable of firing two rounds, a Derringer, and when he got up to her chest, it took only a brief brush to feel there was something inside her corset, "You wanna get that, or should I?"

"What, you shy all of sudden?" Yugito asked with a sneer, "Go ahead, grab it. It's not you don't want to."

The assassin shook his hand and put plunge a hand down into her cleavage, coming back up with regular revolver. With no other weapons on her, he tossed the two guns into a bucket he'd found, turning to Yugito afterwards, "See, that wasn't too bad, now was it?"

She scowled in response, so Naruto moved on to the others. Naruto found Gaara only had on him what he'd shown them before, the revolver and throwing knifes, and both Yagura and Utakata had only a single gun on them as well. One he got those in the bucket, he took out his own pair of revolvers and put them in with them, "Just to be fair, I'll put mine in there too. I've still got my tantos on me though, so don't get any ideas. Han, take these out and sit them on the porch, along with your own gun. I want things to stay nice and calm in here.

"You've got it," Han replied, grabbing the bucket and walking to the door, "Maybe the lack of guns will keep things from getting too bloody.."

"Yeah, maybe," Naruto agreed, looking over the group in front of him with a tanto in each hand, "Now, at this particular moment, there is one thing that I'm certain of...at least two of you are working with that murderous Ms. Fu. Maybe three of you, or even all of you are, but at least two of you are in cahoots with her for sure. Make no mistake, I'm going to figure out which of you it is, and when I do, you have no idea the kind of pain you're in for. Bee was my friend, and more importantly, I shared a battlefield with him, fighting right by his side. Do you know that means?"

Gaara was one who answered, "He saved your life, likely more than once. The two of you looked out for one another, so you're bond with him was a special one."

"Bingo," Naruto confirmed, walking over the table and picking up Bee's bowl of ramen, "Even worse, you did it with poison. Even an Uzumaki could tell ya poison is a coward's tool, and one that's taken way too many good people. Fucking pathetic."

Naruto threw the ramen at Fu, who covered her face as bowl struck her and shattered. She didn't know much about the assassin, but she'd been able to see how smart he was in the short amount of time since they'd met. If anyone could figure what was coming, it would be him. Her only hope was that he wouldn't be able to live long enough to put the pieces together, "Say what you want, you Uzumaki piece of shit, but just know this: you're going to die in this desert. This will be place where your clan will finally be put to an end, and I can't wait to know that I was a part of it. Good fucking luck."


	3. Bloodbath

Well now, would you look at that it. It seems it's time for another thrilling chapter of the Nefarious Nine. This next part will largely be about Naruto piecing together exactly what had happened with ramen, and this is also where the deviations from the film start to become more apparent. There's gonna be plenty of death during this chapter, but I'm guessing you already knew that. We've got lots of blood, lot's mystery, and lots of 'What the fuck is going on' moments to get through. Not much else I can say, now is there? Thanks for reading and be sure to review.

Chapter Soundtrack: Brother Dege-Too Old to Die Young

* * *

"I'm not gonna pretend to be the smartest person in the history of the world," Naruto said, walking up and down the line suspects with his tanto pointed at them, "But any idiot could tell you that the people working for Fu, aren't really who they say they are. Since she runs an all female gang though, any of the men working with her are just some poor saps she hired into this mess. Now, the only woman here is Yugito, which means she's the only one who could really be gang member."

Yugito felt confident she knew where he was going with this, "Is that the best you've got? I'm the only woman, so I must be working with Fu? I never figured you for a genius, but even you should be able to do better than that."

"All I did was point something out, I never said I suspected you of anything," Naruto reminded her, "Although I do know you're hiding something. I've known it since I first got here. Every word you said just made me more certain of it."

Everyone in the room was looking at Yugito now, who kept a straight face the entire time, "So this is when I'm supposed to bite, huh? I'm supposed to ask what is I said that made you so suspicious of me?"

Naruto had stopped to stand right in front of her at this point, "I was gonna tell you whether you asked or not. When I got here and stuck my head out the wagon to hear old man Teuchi had sold this place, I couldn't believe it. This shop has been his whole since he moved from the Hidden Leaf, there was almost no way he'd sell it...almost. As crazy as it sounded, there are a couple of one in a million scenarios where I could see him doing it, so I gave you the benefit of the doubt. It got harder for me to believe though, when you said you were from the Hidden Cloud."

"What does the place I grew up in have to do with anything?" Yugito asked, her curiosity sounding genuine.

"It's just that, well, Teuchi hated Hidden Cloud Villagers," Naruto told her, making everyone in the room's eyes go wide, "The only one I've ever seen him let in here is Bee, and that's because I was willing to vouch for him. He usually asks people where they're from not long after they walk in. If he does that with his customers, I know he would damn sure ask the woman buying his shop where she's from."

Yugito seemed at a loss for what to say. She narrowed her eyes and met Naruto's gaze, "How do we know what you say is true? For all I know, you're only trying to make me look guilty. Better yet, how do we know you aren't working for Fu?"

That was a desperate argument if Naruto ever heard one, "I just chained her to Bee, shot her in the foot, and threw a bowl of poisoned soup at her. You'd have to be stupid to think I'm working with her."

"You know I couldn't have poisoned the ramen though," Yugito realized, "I was standing literally right next to you during your game, watching you eat. No way I was the one who killed Bee."

Naruto already knew that, "Did I say you poisoned the ramen? Like I told you all before, at least two of you are working with her. One of you poisoned the ramen during the game of Shogi, and the other one, well, the other one is you, Yugito. I still haven't gotten to my biggest piece of evidence against you. You see, I've eaten a lot of ramen in my lifetime, and most it was made by Teuchi. It wouldn't matter if I hadn't had a bite of his cooking in a year, I could still pick it out like it was nothing. There is no doubt in my mind that Teuchi is the one who made that ramen, which means you're lying. He made that ramen this morning, you and whoever helped you busted into his shop, killed him, plus whoever the hell was in here, and hid the bodies before the wagon arrived."

This time Yugito didn't say anything. She grinded her teeth and took a deep breath, "You may not be the smartest man in the world, but you're pretty damn good. What's this gonna take? Money? Sex? That's what men always want, isn't it? You gonna let me go if I you let fuck me?"

"There isn't a thing in the world you could offer that'd be enough to let you live," Naruto responded, walking over to the pot of ramen and grabbing an empty bowl, "Don't worry though, I'll be sure to give you a last meal."

He reached into the pot scooped out some broth, walking over to Yugito with it still in his hand. She looked down at it, then back to Naruto, "What if I say I'm not hungry?"

"A sense a humor is always good to have in your final moments," Naruto said, the bowl steady in his hand, "Based on what happened to Bee, this stuff was a pretty painful way to die. There might be a way you can avoid it though. Since you already know you're gonna die, the best you can hope for is that I'll make it painless, and I promise to do just that, if you tell me who else is working for Fu. Otherwise, when Han gets back in here, I'm gonna hold your mouth open while he pours in the poison. Ya got that?"

Yugito looked at Fu, whose face was still covered in blood. She started to make her way towards her boss, saying to Naruto, "Let me do one thing before we move on with this."

No way in hell was Naruto okay with that, "Woah! You don't get to go over there! You'll try to free her, and then I'll end up having to kill both of you!"

"Free her with what?" Yugito asked with her hands in the air, "You took any kind of weapon I had on me. Even if I did free her, it's not like she has any weapons to kill you with. Let me say one last thing to my boss, then you'll get your answer!"

Naruto tended to avoid risks when he could, but it seemed like she would tell him what he wanted to know once she was done. He nodded to Yugito, allowing her to reach Fu. She knelt down beside her, taking out a purple cloth and wiping the blood from her boss's face. Yugito brought up one hand and brushed Fu's cheek, "Thank you Fu, for everything you've done for me. You saved my life when I had nowhere to go, gave me something to fight for. I love you, and I'll never cross you."

Before Fu could ask where all of this was coming from, Yugito grabbed her and smashed their lips together. The gang leader's eyes shot wide as her lips were sucked on hard by her subordinate. Yugito made no effort to hide her pleasure, moaning as she parted lips, a little trail of saliva between them. Fu seemed more shocked than anyone in the room, "Um...thank you?"

"No, thank you," Yugito said, her hand sneaking over to Bee's body and grabbing one of his swords, "It's an honor to die for you!"

Yugito spun around and charged at Naruto, prepared to stab the life out of him with Bee's blade. Naruto threw the bowl of ramen and the floor and brought up his tanto. When Yugito reached him, the assassin deflect her blade with his tanto and stabbed her in the stomach. She began to bleed out, Naruto whispering in her ear, "For the record, I know what it's like, to love someone who can never love you back. I respect your loyalty, if nothing else."

She slid off from the tanto once he finished speaking. There was no need to ask, it was obvious that Yugito was dead. Fu looked at her body, the expression on her face more sympathetic than anyone had ever seen, "I honestly had no clue. Yugito was one of my best girls, and I'm gonna miss the hell out of her. Hard to get good help."

"If by good help, you mean people who are willing to kill for you without question, then yeah, people like that are hard to find," Naruto agreed, walking over to Bee's body and grabbing the blades from his belt, "I am pretty damn pissed at myself for forgetting these blades though. So fucking stupid of me! Gonna be kicking myself for this one for weeks."

Naruto went up to the door, which was still boarded up, and yelled though it, "Hey, Han, you out there? I got one more thing for you? Han, come on, I need you."

The driver didn't call back. It seemed like an eternity of waiting, making Naruto grow increasingly nervous. He grabbed the hammer beside the door and broke off the boards, opening the door with a tad more ease since the storm had settled for a bit. Naruto carefully stuck his head out the doorway to find that Han facing away from him, staring of into the distance, "Thank god, there you are. You do know that when someone screams your name, you're supposed to answer!"

"Hm? Oh, sorry Naruto, I didn't hear you," Han replied, turning around, "I was trying to see how much longer we had before the sandstorm starts going full force again."

"You come to any conclusions?" Naruto asked, "It'll be easier to move these dead bodies without all the wind, so I wanna finish this up before then."

Han gazed into the horizon and said with a shrug, "Best guess, about 15 minutes. How many corpses are we dealing with right now?"

"Two," Naruto said before he tossed Bee's swords to the driver, "You know about Bee, and I got Yugito to admit she was part of it too. She's dead, and at least one more person in there is about to join her."

The larger man nodded, waving for his friend to go back inside, "You get back to work then. I'm gonna stay out here and enjoy the fresh air before we get stuck back in that stuffy shop again."

Naruto headed inside, leaving Han to enjoy his silence. He likely wouldn't have been quite so calm if he'd known that a man was watching him on a dune about 100 yards away. Lying next to the man was a long distance rifle with a primitive version of a scope on top. Trying to fire it this far away and stay accurate was nearly impossible, and there were only a handful of men in the world who could pull it off. Han's life was going to depend on how skilled this sniper was and he didn't even know it. There was no doubt that he'd soon find out.

* * *

"Are you sure you wanna take this shot?" The rookie of Bloody Waterfall asked the sniper with a raised eyebrow, "If you miss, there's a chance he'll be able to figure out where we're at. Han's kind of a badass, so if do take that shot, don't miss, okay?"

The sniper turned to her and snapped, "Don't miss? Oh, what great advice. Man, I almost purposely aimed in the wrong spot, but you stopped me. Good thing you're here, because-"

"I was just saying there's a lot at stake," The rookie interrupted him, "There's no need to be an ass about it!"

With a grunt, the went back to looking down his scope, "No one has to tell me what's at stake here. If you don't want me to miss, what you need to do is stuff it and let me work. Can you manage that?"

If it had been option, the rookie would've grabbed the gun from the man's hand and smacked him in head with it. That would've gotten her in a whole lot of trouble though, so she left him alone. He had a little less than ten minutes to line up his shot, which for someone like him might actually be enough. Until he was ready, his finger would remain right next to that trigger. If bullet would hit it's mark...well that remained to be seen.

* * *

With the door once again nailed shut and Bee's knives disposed of, Naruto was able to return to his detective work. Three men stood in front of him with stone cold looks on their faces, doing their best to look the least suspicious. It seemed their mannerisms would be of no use to Naruto for now, so he returned to the only useful thing left they'd given him; their reasons for being here. Still, Naruto was too clever to open with something that obvious, "It's kind a funny when ya think about it. I rode in here with three corpses on my wagon, now I've got three more that I can add to the pile, and I've got three possible murders standing in front of me. Three sets of three. Strange coincidence, but probably not much else."

"Using idle chit-chat to make us uncomfortable?" Gaara ask in his dry monotone, "Couldn't you at least try and to something more original to figure this out?"

Naruto looked over at Gaara, who was on the far right in the line of men, and replied with a smirk, "What, you're too good for the easy stuff to work on you? Do you have some kind of suggestion for how I should piece the rest of this together?"

The chipper manner in which he spoke vexed Gaara, "I don't care how you do it, I just want this whole thing resolved so I can stop having to worry that I'm going to lose my life over a crime I didn't commit. What was wrong with the deduction act you used on Yugito? That seemed to work well enough."

"It did, which was why I was nervous about using it twice," Naruto revealed, a statement that no one but him seemed to understand, "You guys could already be trying to think of a response to everything I say. Tell you what Gaara; since you seem to want it so bad, I'll see what I can deduce from you...that's okay with you, isn't it Mr. Kazekage?"

Gaara's face continued to mask his feelings of contempt for the situation, "Go ahead, seeing as I've got nothing to hide. Everything I've told you since we've met has been the truth."

"You gotta know I don't believe that," Naruto said with a chuckle, "If you don't, you clearly haven't heard the sarcasm in my voice every time I called you 'Kazekage'."

"Believe what you want, it only matters what you can prove," Gaara said, putting a stop to the assassin's jokes, "Is there anything that I've said that you can prove I've been lying about?"

Naruto sighed, looking down the line at the other two men. None of them had said anything he could confirm or deny, at least not for certain. He was going to have to go with his gut on this one, at least to some degree, and with Gaara, there was one thing Naruto's gut kept screaming at him, "You aren't the one who poisoned that ramen."

Even Gaara was unable to keep straight face when he said that, "You're joking? You all of a sudden believe me about being the Kazekage?"

"Oh no, I'd still bet money that you're lying through your teeth about that," Naruto told him, "I just don't think you killed Bee. Fu has reputation for being controlling, and the time I've spent with her only makes me think that's true. Odds are, she had her girls tell whoever's working for her the exact story they're supposed to give me. No way they would pick out something as crazy as the Kazekage. Something like that does take balls though, I'll give you that."

Gaara would've fought the claims that he was a liar, but right now he was just happy that he was no longer a suspect, "Finally, you come to senses, at least in this regard. Any chance this means I can rest on the bed while you sort the rest of this out?"

"I'd rather you stayed right where you are until I'm certain," Naruto responded, turning his attention to the next person down the line, "That brings us to you, Yagura. Remind me why you're here again."

The young man crossed his arms as he said, "I'm bringing a message from the Hidden Mist to the Hidden Sand. It's an important one, so they didn't want to risk a telegram fucking it up. The guy I work for knew I was headed to the Sand already, so he offered me some cash to do him this favor."

Naruto mulled that over in his head, "Headed to the Sand already? What did you need to travel so far for?"

"I'm meeting up with an old girlfriend," Yagura said, his jaw clenching, "Plus, I like visiting there anyways, so why not?"

"All the way to Hidden Sand just to get laid? Damn, you must be desperate," Naruto joked, wondering if it would provoke him, "You that hard up, or does she do shit you can't get the girl's back in the Hidden Mist to do?"

Yagura's muscled tensed when he replied, "I can get laid if I want to. We're friends and I don't get to see her much. Do we still fuck sometimes? Yeah, if we're both hammered and lonely. It's that simple. Nowhere deeper you can dig with me."

Somehow, Naruto doubted that, "There's probably many more holes in your story than you think, but I'll move on to something else for now. What about this shop? What made you choose this as the place you stayed at?"

"That's a stupid question, considering it's the only one in this fucking desert," Yagura answered, "Where else was I gonna stop?"

Hard to argue with him there. Perhaps Naruto needed to try a different approach to this one, "You sound like you've been here before. Is that ture? If it is, you'll probably be able to tell me a couple of things about the previous, and now deceased, owner."

"Oh lovely, I get death quiz just like Yugito," Yagura sighed, knowing there was no way out of it, "Fine, but I've only ever been here a few times, so don't make it something only a regular would know."

"Don't worry, these'll be easy ones," Naruto said, looking around the room, "Teuchi always had a pot of coffee boiling for customers. You remember where he usually set it?"

Yagura pointed to the fireplace, "On a little rack above the fireplace. It was high enough to keep it from burning, but low enough to keep it from getting cold."

Naruto was unimpressed, despite the younger man being correct, "You got one right, but it's one any idiot could've guessed. Let's try something a little harder. What was Teuchi always singing when he made the ramen?"

"Nice try, but Teuchi never sang," Yagura said with a smirk, "Even he knew that he couldn't carry a tune."

Now it was starting to look like he might be telling the truth, "You're two for two. You go three for three, and I'll move to Utakata. What's his daughter's name?"

Yagura felt he was safe at this point, "Ayame, she was in here all the time. Real looker to, had these nice-GAHHH!"

"Well gee, that looks like it hurts," Naruto said in mock sympathy as he dug his tanto into Yagura's shoulder, "Don't that stop you from telling me about Ayame though."

This didn't make any sense to Yagura, "What are you doing? I answered the question right! Oh, you are so dead you motherfucker!"

"That's true, you did answer the question right. The problem is what you said after that," Naruto told him, twisting the blade so that he'd cry out even louder, "You said Ayame's here all the time, but that's a load of bullshit. Teuchi talks about her a lot, which meant you probably would've heard about her, but Ayame's almost never here. She's going to school in the Hidden Leaf, and only gets to visit her father once every few months. At most, Ayame's sees her dad four or five times a year. It's pretty much impossible that she could've been here every time you stopped in. Ayame was here when you stopped in this time though, wasn't she?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Yagura pleaded, blood pouring from his shoulder, "She's always here when I come, I swear!"

Naruto kept pushing the blade until it hit bone, "Do you have any idea the kind of odds you'd be talking about, dumbass? It's over, I know you're working for Fu! Figures, since I never trusted you. You gave up that information on Roshi for nothing more than a decent bottle of booze. You'll do anything as long as you're paid well for it! I'm gonna slit your throat motherfucker!"

"No, you won't," Yagura rasped out as a chain dropped from the sleeve of his coat. There a blade just smaller than a hunting knife attached to it that he caught in his hand, "Cause I'm gonna slit yours!"

Catching a glimpse of the blade, Naruto pulled his tanto out of Yagura's shoulder and jumped back, narrowly missing a slashing attack. Another fell from Yagura's other sleeve, making the assassin pull out his other tanto, "A hidden set of weapons? Something that can get past my pat down must cost a fortune."

Yagura whipped the chained blades around simply for show as he bragged, "Oh, they were costly alright, but they'll be so worth it if I get to kill you with them. You ready Uzumaki?"

"I more than ready, but you're about to find out that, aren't you," Naruto replied, keeping an eye on Yagura's good arm as he brought it up and took it back down, sending the blade flying towards the assassin, "And so it begins."

He dove under the chain and ran towards Yagura, ready to murder the bastard. Despite the pain in the shoulder he'd be stabbed in, Yagura swung the other chain as well, but it proved useless. Naruto caught it with his tanto, the metal wrapping around the blade and giving the assassin control over it. Using Yagura's injury to his advantage, Naruto yanked hard and ripped the chain from his hand, making the young man scream out in agony, "Fuck! You have no idea the kinda shit I'm gonna do to you!"

"You're gonna be dead before you can do anything to me," Naruto yelled back, removing the chain from his blade when he made his way to his opponent, "How about I shut you up before you say anything else stupid?"

Yagura threw the blade of his other chain at the assassin's feet, which proved to be another fruitless effort. Naruto jumped over his foe's head, letting the blade hang and catch his neck. With a gag, Yagura's windpipe was squeezed shut by his own weapon and the blonde landed right behind him. He thrashed and sputtered as Naruto pulled tightly on the chain. During his struggle, he dropped some sort of metal vial, which was a little smaller than a flask, out of his pocket. That confirmed what Naruto had suspected all along, "I fucking knew it! Hey Fu, I'll pay you a million ryo if you drink whatever's left in there."

To add insult to injury, Naruto kicked it over to her. Fu picked it up the vial and spat on it before she tossed it into the nearby fireplace, "Can't believe my girls paid for a guy who isn't even smart enough to ditch the evidence. I'm gonna chew their asses out next time I see them."

"It's getting a little sad that you still think you're gonna see them again," Naruto said, listening to Yagura taking his final breaths. With his eyes dead, it was safe to let his body fall limp to the ground, "Another one sent back to his maker. So Fu, you feeling anywhere near as confident now?"

"Eh, this still isn't the worse situation I've ever been in," Fu replied, making Naruto smack his own forehead, "I'll give it to you though, it's getting up there. At least I know you won't kill me."

Naruto got down next to her and brought his tanto right up to her juggler, "What brought you to that conclusion?"

The cold steel didn't do much to change Fu's demeanor, "You're an Uzumaki. No way would you turn down that extra 50,000 ryo, even if it meant you had to keep me alive. Greed always gets the best of you bastards."

"I'll be bringing you to the gallows alive alright, but it's not for the money," Said Naruto, surprising her, "I told how hard it was for me in the Hidden Leaf. Hell on earth with the way the villagers were trying to chase me out. There was one girl though, one girl who was sweetest, most innocent thing I've ever seen in my life. She didn't have a mean bone in her body. When every other kid in our village walked past me with their noses up, she'd stop to see if I was okay, even play with me sometimes. Shit, she gave me my first kiss when I was fifteen. Day after that was when I massacred the Namikaze's though, and the Third Hokage had to banish me to save my life. Every since the day, I've wondered where that girl is and how she's doing. I never thought I'd get to find out...until today, when it turned out you killed her."

Fu's jaw dropped when he said that, "You're fucking kidding me? Hinata was your old girlfriend?"

"Not exactly a girlfriend, but something like that," Naruto said, pulling his tanto back and sheathing it, "That's why I'm willing to take the risk of making sure you come in alive. There's nothing I can do that would compare to the kind of pain the Hyuuga clan is gonna put you though if they get ahold of you. Unfortunately for me, I'm not the only one who this decision affects. I've still got Han out there, and this call is just as much his as it is mine. I'm gonna go out there and ask him what he thinks we should do with you. Until then, you sit tight. You're gonna die either way, so what's it matter to you?"

There was a little more at stake for her than that, "Considering they're gonna torture me, I'd rather you just kill me now...or, you know not at all. Lucky me though, I killed your friend, your girlfriend, and nearly poisoned you. Fuck, that's a tough hand, even for me."

Naruto found little sympathy for her. He walked to the door to get Han, both Utakata and Gaara watching him like a hawk as he did. His footsteps struck the floor each time with a thud, at least until he hit the rug in the middle of the room...wait, middle of the room? Teuchi didn't have a rug in the middle of the room, he kept by the table in case something spilled. Wasn't there usually a cellar door in this spot too? Something was off here; Naruto could just feel it, "There something in the cellar you didn't want me to see Fu? Does it even matter anymore?"

"How would I know?" Fu asked him, "You murder anyone who would know, now didn't you?"

Instead of responding, Naruto threw the rug back to find he was right about there being a door underneath. He reached down and pulled it open, growing sick at what he found inside, "Four dead bodies. I know that one's Teuchi's, and the other one is Ayame's. Don't know the guy with the hood or one with the glasses, but they're for sure dead. Are those darts in two of their necks? Last I checked, none of the stiffs had a blow gun on them. Either someone's hiding another weapon from me, or we've got some visitors not far from here."

His train of thought was broken when a single gunshot went off outside. Naruto sprinted to get to the door, but a small projectile whizzed past him. He skidded to a stop and rotated to see who'd fired it at him. It soon became apparent that the musician Utakata was a man of many talents. In his has hand was a metal blow gun, made from what had once been his flute, "Sorry Naruto, old boy, you seem like a nice enough guy, but I was paid to do a job, and failing is not something I want to be known for. Getting Yagura's share of the pay will be a nice little bonus I suppose."

"You and Yagura were partners? Not something I was expecting, but alright," Naruto said, his hand snaking it's way to his back, "The blow gun is neat, but your aim could use a little work."

"What can I say? I was in a rush," Utakata said, putting another dart in his weapon, "I promise, it won't happen again."

Utakata brought the blow gun up to his lip as Naruto was about to draw whatever he was hiding. A metal clanking came from Gaara's direction before a chain with a small scythe on the end of it struck Utakata's weapon, wrapping around it, and ripping it from his hand. Gaara was smiling when dark haired man looked at him, "I think you look even more shocked than your partner did when he was disarmed. You even lost it in a similar fashion."

"Kazekage or not, you just went way up in my book Gaara," Naruto said, his hand coming around with a strange looking revolver in his hand, "Step aside, and I'll finish the job."

The gun Naruto was holding was unique to say the least. The barrel was made of a large, steel jack knife, which was serrated at the end, and had handle was made from a strong sort of metal. There was a small mechanism that connected to a button by the trigger that could rotate the blade for maximum damage. Utakata was not in the mood to see this, "Wait a minute, you said you threw your guns outside like the rest of us."

Naruto had been waiting to say this all day, "I'm an Uzumaki, what'd you expect?"

"Oh fuck y-" Utakata began, but was cut of by two shots from the revolver. Blood splatter from his chest and fell back onto the floor, now the fourth dead body inside the room

"See Fu, we Uzumaki's don't cheat," Naruto explained, "We simply make sure to have one ace up our sleeve so that we don't end up dead."

Fu's eyes were darting around the room. She said nothing, as she was preoccupied with what her next move needed to be from where he was standing, Gaara admired the craftsmanship on Naruto's weapon in the meantime, "That's a fine gun you've got there. Who made it?"

"Hattori Hanzo," Naruto said, his mind more focused on the door, "Han, you out there? Han, talk to me man, we need you."

Gaara stated the obvious when no response came, "I'm guessing we won't be getting much help from him."

"You said 'we.' Does that mean you and I are working together now?"

"That would seem to be the case."

The situation was getting so desperate that Naruto didn't even mind that Gaara had hidden a weapon from him. In fact, it could prove pretty helpful, "Get ready. It's two of us against who knows how many of them. You get over by Fu and get that scythe up against her neck. We're about to have some company."

A simple enough command. Gaara walked over to Fu and grabbed her by her hair, forcing her head up so that he could have shot at slicing all of the right veins if he needed to. For quite some time the room was silent. A person probably could've heard shell casing drop. Naruto had no idea what might lie on the other side of that door, but he was going to keep his pistol at the ready just in case he needed to send it straight to hell.

* * *

 _Now, to understand the how the situation got so out of hand, one has to take a few steps, or a few hours back, more accurately. This is because at the shop, back when Teuchi and his family was still alive, two wagons pulled up that Naruto and the others knew nothing about. These wagons had carried six wanted criminals with them, along with one other passenger. A few of them, Yagura, Yugito, and Utakata, would be staying in said shop for a few hours to come. The four others though, were quite a different story. One was a black haired 20 year old with a sniper rifle on his back by the name of Sasuke. Traveling with Sasuke was pink haired woman and black haired woman named Sakura and Tenten respectively. Both were roughly his age. Finally, the last person traveling with them was a girl in chains, with pale skin that matched her eyes, and dark blue hair that could've been spotted a mile away. Hinata Hyuuga was her name, and it did appear that she was alive and well..._


	4. One Step Foreword, Two Steps Back

Hello there my readers, are you ready for another chapter of the Nefarious Nine? Considering that you somehow ended up here, I'm going to assume yes. Now, we've got a lot to cover today, starting off by explaining the twist that came at the end of the last chapter. Hinata being alive is something I've had set up from the beginning, and adding in the others was a part of the plan I had hinted at in previous chapters as well. Once the flashback is over, we'll get back to the present times to see who all, if anyone, is going to survive this bloody mess. Can't wait to see how you guys react to everything. Thanks for reading, and please review.

Warning-There will be minor sexual content in this chapter. A heads up will be given, and I'll make certain what might be missed is understandable if you should choose to skip it.

Chapter Soundtrack-Ennio Morricone: As a Judgement

* * *

 _The chains around Hinata's wrist rattled as she was dragged up the dunes of the Suna desert. Sakura was the one holding onto the chains, following behind Sasuke and Tenten as they walked away from the shop. Even in her current situation, Hinata was a curious girl, "I don't understand, why did you bother to drag me all the way to this place only to set up tent hundreds of yards away from it? It doesn't make any sense."_

 _Sakura yanked on the chain as they got the top of the hill, growling back at her, "Because, the killer who's bringing Fu to Hidden Sand for his pay would spot you in a minute. Thanks to your blue hair, you're unmistakable. If he knows you're alive and that we faked your death, he's going to know that something's up. To save Fu, the place has to be perfect so that Bee won't suspect a thing."_

" _I see...You know Sakura, I'd suspect this sort of thing out of you," Hinata spat, an insult that seemed meaningless to her captor, "But you Tenten, you and I were friends. You were supposed to marry my cousin. How could you do this to me and my family?"_

" _Because Neji fucked another girl, that's how," Tenten fired right back, "Neji might deny it, and you may not believe it, but I know it's true. He was screwing Hana. I was trying to track down Fu so that I could thank her for killing you, even though I figured I'd end up dead trying to find her. Only one person made it back from that team that tried to track down whoever took you out, but they swore the Bloody Waterfall gang was who they saw. There was so much blood and no body when you went missing, they kinda figured you had to be dead. Fu was good though, and she knew just how to draw enough blood from you so that you wouldn't die. Really, I can't thank her enough for taking me in like she did."_

 _Sasuke was still a little confused by his bosses plan, "I get that Fu wanted to kidnap Hinata so she could get the satisfaction of turning the future clan head of one of the most precious bloodlines in the world into a bloodthirsty criminal, but why fake her death? The Hyuuga's are gonna chase after us either way, so what does it matter?"_

 _This was one Hinata knew the answer to, "As long as the current clan heir is still alive, no matter what state they're in, another one can't be chosen. It's a stupid tradition, but the Hyuuga take it deadly seriously. If I'm alive, they'll never stop chasing after me because they'll never be able to. Since they think I'm dead though, they can move on with my younger sister Hanabi. They're angry now, but passions will settle eventually, and Fu can try and bring me to her side without outside interference. I don't think getting captured by Bee was part of her plan though. Guess Fu's not a smart as she likes to think she is."_

" _You shut your whore mouth," Sakura snapped, slapping Hinata across the face, "If it wasn't for Fu, I never would've seen Sasuke again! You have no idea how much I owe here!"_

 _Hinata couldn't stop herself from sneering, "Oh really? Is that why you're fucking her lover behind her back?"_

 _That was enough to silence her. Fu didn't care about Sasuke emotionally at all, but he was good enough in bed that she allowed him to be the only male member of the gang. When Sakura found out six months ago that Sasuke, who she'd dated for over a year when he'd lived in the Hidden Leaf, had joined up with the Bloody Waterfall gang, she took no time in deciding what she needed to do next. Though it took her some time, she was dedicated and managed to track down the gang, joining up and sleeping with Sasuke behind Fu's back. Anyone who knew Fu could tell you that was a bad idea, considering that she was possessive of virtually everything she owned. Sasuke may not mean anything to her, but he was still something that Fu considered hers. If she ever found out Sakura was screwing him, no way would she let her live. Hinata was more or less threatening her by pointing it out._

" _You bitch," Sakura screamed, yanking the chain again and forcing her to the ground, "You so much as talk to Fu when we meet her, and I'll snap your fucking neck!"_

 _Sasuke groaned, walking over and picking Hinata up off the ground, "Sakura, don't damage the goods. Sure, Fu will kill you if she finds out about us, but she'll kill you if you ruin her plans too. You haven't been with the gang as long as I have, so you don't enough credit with her."_

" _Speaking of how long you've been with the gang," Tenten began, seeing an opening to ask a question she'd had for some time, "Sasuke, how did you end going from one of the most famous snipers in the world to one of the infamous members of the Bloody Waterfall Gang?"_

" _That's a story for another day," Sasuke answered, grabbing the tent Tenten had thrown over her back, "Now, let's get this thing set up before the sandstorm hits. In case you hadn't noticed, we're low on time. Hopefully everything's going okay inside the shop."_

* * *

 _Within said shop, Yugito, Yagura, and Utakata had just entered, looking around to see who all was there. One was a grey haired young man in glasses sitting on one end of the bar, while the other was hooded man around the same age wearing a pair of sunglasses. A man the three criminals assumed was Teuchi was behind the counter, stirring a pot of ramen, with a girl in her mid twenties washing said counter, singing a little a song to herself. Of to the side, sitting in front of the Shogi board by his lonesome, was a man with a red beard. Not a particularly dangerous group._

 _Seeing as Utakata was supposed to be the social one, he decided to be the one to introduce himself first, "Hello there, my fellow weary travelers. I am Utakata, flute player extraordinare! The young lady to my left it Yugito and my friend to my right is Yagura. We've been sharing a wagon for several days and needed a place to stretch our legs. Our driver decided to stay with a friend he has not far from here. Hopefully we'll be pleasant company for one another, eh?"_

" _Always happy to see a new customer," Teuchi told them, motioning over to the brown haired girl, "That's my daughter Ayame over there humming to herself. I'd sing along with her, but I can hold a damn tune to save my life. Shino and Kabuto are my two customers at the counter, and we've got Roshi over there by the Shogi board. We've got stuff all around here for you buy, if you need to know the price of something, just ask me or Ayame."_

" _Thank you sir, we'll do just that," Utakata replied, allowing his other friends to wander around the room. He sat down at the table in the center of the room, toying with his flute underneath it._

 _Yagura walked up the counter sat down, looking at the wall of liquor behind the shop owners, "Damn, you guys have got one hell of a selection. How much is it for a bottle of Snake Bite?"_

 _Reaching under the counter, Teuchi pulled out a piece of paper with a series of prices on it, "Let's see, it would be...damn, 120 ryo. Guess that's what you get when you have to import it from Rice Country."_

" _Shit, if I'm gonna pay that much, it better be from a river flowing down from heaven," Yagura scoffed, pointing to a jar filled with dango, "Give me a couple sticks of dango and we'll call it a day. Oh, and can we smoke in here?"_

 _Yagura was pulling out an expensive looking cigarette holder, already assuming that Teuchi would say yes. He was shocked the chef brought down a meat clever chopped the holder in half while still in his hand. After he'd done so, he went back to cooking as if nothing had happened. Ayame laughed as she shook her head and grabbed out two sticks of dango from the jar, setting them across from Yagura, "No, dad doesn't like that. Says it's not good for your health. You owe us half a ryo for the dango by the way."_

" _Thanks," Yagura said, still shaking a little bit from the shock of what had just happened, quickly pulling out a coin and setting it on the table. As his hand went back down, he brushed his fingers against his gun, getting a small rush when he thought on what he was about to do. He turned to the one named Shino, getting a good look at him, before turning to the one named Kabuto. Both seemed unconcerned with his presence, which was likely for the best._

" _How much is it for a cup of coffee," Yugito called from the fireplace, "You guys make it strong, or weak?"_

 _Teuchi yelled back to her, "It's on the stronger side. You just gotta give me one ryo and then you can have as much as ya like. Hey, I never got around to asking; where are you guys from?"_

 _After he asked, the shop owner took his pot off from the stove and walked over to the table, setting it down. Utakata raised his eyebrow at him, "I'm from the Hidden Mist myself. Any particular reason you dragged the food all the way over here?"_

" _I need to let it sit for about 15 minutes before I add in the last two teaspoons of beef base," Teuchi answer, wiping some sweat from his brow, "The Hidden Mist, eh? That's a nice enough place I suppose. So, Miss Yugito, I've got two questions for you. One, did you want that coffee or not, and two, where are you from?"_

 _Yugito smiled and grabbed the pot from the fireplace, being careful to grab the much cooler metal on the handle. She glanced at Yagura and Utakata, both of whom nodded, before looking back at Teuchi, "I don't know, it seems pretty hot. Why don't you tell me if it's cool enough."_

 _Rather than pouring some in a cup for him to taste, Yugito did something much crueler. She threw the scalding coffee onto Teuchi, making him scream as it burned the hell out of his skin. Coming up from the table, Utakata brought up the blow gun version of his flute and shot the chef in the throat. He sputtered for a few moments before falling to the ground, blood pouring from his mouth. Ayame went to scream for her father, but Yagura drew his gun and put a bullet in her chest and stomach, rendering her silent. Shino jumped up, but wasn't standing for long, as Yugito reached down to her ankle and pulled out her deringer, unloading both bullets into him. Kabuto soon suffered a similar fate, those his came in the form of dart to the base of his neck. So much blood filled the room that it was almost like a mist. With all of them dead, the three criminals turned to Roshi, who had his hands up in the air, "Look, whatever it is those guys did to you, it's none of my business. You guys can just go on your way, and I'll say I never saw your faces, okay? Please, I don't wanna die."_

" _Yugito, you're representing our client, so this is your call," Yagura called over to the woman, "I think he adds a little something to the air of this place, but that's just me."_

" _Let me think," Yugito replied, reloading her deranger, "I'm supposed to say I own the place, so that means you two would have to be my customers...only two people in here would be a little strange during a sandstorm. Couldn't hurt to have another person with us. This guy's name is Roshi, right?"_

 _The bearded man nodded frantically, "Yes, and I'm more than happy to play along with whatever it is you've got planned! Just think of me like an actor or something."_

 _Yugito tapped her foot for a few moment, then put away her gun, "Don't talk to anybody unless spoken to, and try to keep your head down. Play along like you said you will, and you might get to live through this. Got it?"_

" _Of course, I'll keep the talking to a minimum," Roshi said, looking around at all the dead bodies. He decided now was the time to try and be helpful to get himself some points, "That trap door, in the middle of the room there, it goes pretty deep. If you chuck the bodies down there, you might be able to just throw a rug over it without anyone being the wiser."_

 _Considering they had nowhere else to put them, it wasn't a bad idea. It would be the best place for them to start trying to make this place look somewhat presentable. After all, they had guests to prepare for._

* * *

 _The next hour was spent cleaning nearly every inch of what had once been Teuchi's Tavern. Blood was scrubbed off the floors, bodies were thrown into the cellar, and Yugito grabbed the ramen off the table and finished it up, careful to put in two teaspoons of beef base like Teuchi had said. As a whole, it looked like a place that had just been taken over by new owners, at least at first glance. Of course someone who knew the place inside and out could've figured out something sinister was going on, but the criminals didn't figure they'd run across anyone like that. Of course they proven wrong a few hours later, but luckily for them, there was a backup plan in place. One that involved one of the greatest snipers the world had ever seen._

* * *

Sasuke walked up to the porch of the shop to get a look at Han's corpse for the same reason he checked all the dead bodies of those he killed; to see how clean of a shot he'd managed. Tenten's questions of his skill went right out the window when she saw just minutes ago how Han's body had jerked back as he fell to the ground. It was unlikely that one shot would kill him, but given the time it'd take the group of for criminals to travel over there from where they were, he'd more than likely bleed out. Even if he didn't, he'd been in no state to attack them.

"How on earth did you learn to shoot like that?" Tenten asked, the group only a couple of feet away now, "It took me a while to get him in focus, and I had a fucking telescope! You need to be fucking magical to make that shot!"

"What can I say? I'm just that good," Sasuke remarked as they finally reached Han's body, a long trail of blood behind it. He was reaching for his shotgun before they got there, "Looks like he croaked just in time. Would've been a pain in the ass if we gotten here and he started shooting at us."

Everyone's poster relaxed, that is except for Hinata's. She had looked on long enough to see Han's chest move in just the slightest, indicating that he might still be alive. Hinata didn't plan on giving them any warning in the hopes that maybe he'd off all of them and she could go free. In the middle of her thoughts, the half alive Han made his move, grabbing his shotgun and pointing it as Sasuke. The driver wasn't fast enough, thanks to all that blood he'd lost, and the sniper grabbed the barrel of the gun before he could get even one shot off. Sasuke smacked Han in the forehead with the weapon, jerking it out of his hands while his head flung back. Once he had the opening, the sniper spun the barrel to the other side and fired one round into Han's chest, this time killing him for sure, "Hm, too bad. That plan might have actually worked if he wasn't injured. Alright, Fu's right behind that door. Everybody ready to go in?"

Sakura had to object, saying in her most seductive tone, "Not yet, there's one more thing I need to do first."

"Oh really?" Sasuke asked with a small smirk as his lover walked over to him and put a hand behind his head, shoving him into a kiss. Both Hinata and Tenten groaned as they watched the two of them spend the next thirty seconds sucking on one another's tongues. When they finally separated, Sasuke had a look in his eyes like a wild animal, "If we had the time, I swear I'd fuck you right up against that door. Come on, let's get in there before Fu ends up dead and we're all out of a job. I'll call in, see who we're dealing with."

They all got into position, Hinata and Sakura on one side of the door, and Sasuke and Tenten on the other. Standing in front of it would more than likely get them shot if somebody other than an ally was still kicking in there. Sasuke got his voice as loud as he could make it and screamed in, "Hey Fu, you in there? We need to come in guns blazing or are can we just walk right in?"

"Everybody's dead except for two fuckers who-OW," Fu called from the inside, getting cut off mid sentence, "Don't hit me you blonde bastard!"

Tenten decided to speak up next, "Look, whoever's in there, we don't want any trouble. Just give us Fu, and we can go our separate ways."

A voice they didn't recognize, Naruto's, called back to them, "That sure as hell isn't gonna happen! Your men killed some people that I kinda like, and tried to kill me! Both of those are things that I have a pretty fucking hard time forgiving!"

"That's fair, I get that," Sasuke replied, worried this was starting to go the wrong way. Maybe he needed a more personal approach, "Can I ask who it is I'm speaking to?"

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki, and you're not gonna talk me into letting this bitch live," Naruto screamed, shocking Sasuke.

In the mother of all coincidences, he was dealing with somebody he actually knew, "No shit? Well Naruto, I don't suppose you remember your old friend Sasuke Uchiha, do you? Would you believe he's standing right outside this door?"

"Bullshit," Naruto said without thinking, "The Sasuke I knew would never agree to work with someone as fucked up as Fu!"

Sasuke could see that his one time friend at least knew who he was, which was a start. He'd have some explaining to do though, "Things change, my man. Why don't you let us in there and we'll talk? No gunfighting, no tricks, just talking. Can we do that?"

No response came at first. It was a loaded question, considering that it could end up with a whole lot of people being killed. Standing as they were wasn't getting anyone anywhere though, so Naruto eventually forced himself to yell to the criminals, "You can come in, but you do so slowly, and with your guns pointed to the ground. I promise I'll do the same. Can ya handle that?"

"Most of it, though we do have hostage out here we intend to keep a knife on," Sasuke countered, certain Naruto would see reason, "It's only fair, since I'm sure you've got Fu as your hostage."

That was a tough point to dispute, "As long as the guns stay down, I can live with that. Kick the door open, and get in here already. We've got a lot of catching up to do."

* * *

Gaara still had his sytch to Fu's throat and Naruto's gun was still up and ready for use when the door was kicked in. Sasuke, who the young Uzumaki recognized almost instantly thanks to his distinguished onyx eyes, was the first to enter, his demeanor as calm as could be. Next came Sakura, who Naruto had only seen a handful of times in the Hidden leaf, then Tenten, another person he knew vaguely, followed by someone that nearly caused the blonde to turn pale. Someone with a soft face he hadn't gazed upon in years, "Hinata? Hinata Hyuuga? But you're supposed to be dead! Everyone in the Elemental Nations thinks you but the big one!"

"It's a long story, and one we don't feel like telling," Tenten said before her prisoner could speak, pressing the knife she was holding up Hinata's throat to make sure she couldn't say a word, "Weren't you supposed to have that gun of yours pointed at the ground, pretty boy?"

No matter how much he wanted simply but a bullet in them right there, Naruto had high stakes to think about. Higher in fact that he originally would've anticipated. He brought his gun down and walked until he was directly in front of Sasuke. This reunion was one christened in the blood splattered all around them, "Sasuke Uchiha, it's been a long damn time. I always hoped to see you again, but I would've hoped it was under better circumstances. You gonna explain any of this shit to me, or should I try and piece it together myself?"

Sasuke had missed Naruto's sense of humor, "Don't trouble yourself dobe, I can do it. It's not a complicated story really. You remember the war with the Hidden Sound, don't you?"

"A bloodbath like that stays with a guy," Naruto replied, "That was the last time I saw you. It was the final battle of the war, you and me were talking about what kind lives we wanted to lead when it was all over. Both of us had seen a lot of death. You, me, and Bee had the highest kill counts by far. With just that sniper rifle right there, you killed about 30 people in one day. By the end of the war, it was near triple digits...I think it was that high for all of us."

"That's a hard number to live with," Sasuke said, nearly everyone in the room entranced by the story at this point, "Or it least, it used to be. I remember you told me that when it was over, you wanted to disappear off the map, killing off the worst people you could find to make money. Maybe you'd even find yourself a nice girl. Me, I couldn't see myself doing much of anything. The Uchiha clan trained me to be the killer, so what else was there for me?"

Naruto remembered him having another set of skills he'd yet to mention, "Don't forget, you were also able to charm your way into the pants of half the civilian girls. Anytime you were off duty, you were trying to fuck anything that had a tight ass or big tits."

"A bit of an over-exaggeration," Sasuke pointed out with a chuckle, "But I'll admit, I have a fondness for the feeling of new flesh. It was when I was thinking on that fondness that I realized, killing wasn't the only thing I had to live for. I liked drinking, I liked smoking, I liked money, and I loved fucking. To put it simply, I enjoyed the finer things in life. If I was going to be forced into a life of killing to survive, why shouldn't I at least enjoy myself? So I left the Uchiha clan and the wars behind, choosing instead to find a lifestyle more suited to my vices. Never looked back, and I've enjoyed every second of it."

Not an excuse that Naruto seemed all that fond of, "So what, you figured, 'I was already gonna be a bad guy, let's just go all the way?' Come on Sasuke, you know it wasn't like that. Yeah, we killed people, but it's not like we didn't have our reasons. Before, you had comrades to fight for and good people to defend. Look at yourself now, working for a piece of shit like Fu! You can't tell me this is a life you're okay with!"

"My poor, naive friend," Sasuke said, looking at Fu with a grin, "When I bothered with morality, my life was miserable. It wasn't until I met my Fu here that I was shown it's not something worth worrying about if you wanna have any sort of real life. Everyone in this world dies, so why spend the time we're stuck here worrying about right and wrong? Have much fun as you can, while you can, that's the way I learned to live. Couldn't hurt you if you lived that way too. Who knows, maybe we can find a place for you in the Bloody Waterfall Gang? What do you say Fu?"

"Are you fucking high? There's no way I'm going to," Fu started to say, but noticed the way every one of her gang members was glaring at her, "Oh come on, don't look at me like that! I can't have an Uzumaki in my gang!"

Sasuke glared as his boss, "Dammit Fu, this guy just picked apart everyone we had in here like they were nothing! It's not like we couldn't use him! Put aside your prejudice for five seconds and realize this is what we need to do!"

That suggestion wasn't going to stand for long, considering how Naruto felt, "Give it up Sasuke. Even if she'd take me, I've got no interesting in joining you twisted fuckers. How about we talk about a deal instead?"

"I thought you said you had no interest in deal," Sakura vaguely recalled, "You said Fu had done more than you can forgive, didn't you?"

"That was before I found out you had a friend of mine in chains," Naruto remarked, his eyes meeting Hinata's, "Lucky for us, we've got Fu in chains too. You give us Hinata, and we'll give you Fu. Then, all of us will go our separate ways. That sounds fair, doesn't it Gaara?"

Gaara felt like getting out this alive, so he was inclined to agree, "I could live with that. What do the rest of you say?"

The entire gang looked at one another, Naruto and his redheaded friend watching them carefully. It seemed the rest of the gang was interested in the deal, but Fu's face suggested she had no intention of giving up her prize. Hand signals began between Sasuke and his boss that went unnoticed for only a few brief moment before Naruto realized what was going on. He raised up his gun and screamed, "What in the fuck are you-"

"Sasuke, now," Fu yelled overtop of him, throwing her head back hard enough to crack Gaara in the jaw, "Tenten, Sakura, follow his lead!"

Being as close as he was to Naruto, Sasuke was able to grab his wrist and point it down at ground before the first shot went off from his costume revolver, "Sorry dobe, looks like we're on opposite sides this time. I'll see what I can do for you when it's all said and done."

Sakura came up behind Naruto with a bored that had flown off from the door and smacked him in the head with it, knocking him unconscious. Tenten, dragging Hinata right along with her, tackled Gaara before he could retaliate against Fu. Next thing he knew, he was getting repeatedly smacked in the face by the girl until he was knocked out with his friend. With their two enemies out old, Sasuke was able to walk up to Fu, pulling Han's shotgun out from behind his back. He'd grabbed it on the way in for just such an occasion, "Hold out your arms, Fu. Time to let those hands of your's free."

"Finally, I can get these fucking things off," Fu grumbled, moving her body out of the way and positioning her hands in a way that allowed her lover to point barrel of his gun at the point where the two chains on her wrist met, "It's about time. Alright, I think I'm out of the way. Let her rip!"

Those words made Sasuke fire off the other round in shotgun, destroying the links within the chains easily. Now able more her hands apart, she motioned for someone to hand her something, with only Sasuke knowing what she wanted. He pulled a knife out of his pocket and tossed it to her, Fu quickly using her once again nimble hands dig inside the locks with the blade. One clicked open, and she made short work of the other. Handing Sasuke back his knife, Fu felt her wrists, which were raw at this point, and stood up, pointing to some rope in the corner of the room, "I want them tied up. That storm's raging again, and if we're gonna be stuck here, I may as well pay these two back for all the trouble they caused me. They have no idea the kind of pain they're about to be in!"

* * *

When Naruto once again awoke, he did so to find that his wrists were bound to the headboard of one of the two beds in the room. On the bed next to him seemed to be Gaara, but he couldn't be sure, as he was still groggy from being hit over the head. His eyes soon adjusted to the light, and he could see that not only was Gaara indeed tied to the bed, but there was someone standing over him. It was Fu, and she had a circular shaped blade with a sharpened outer edge, a weapon Naruto believed was called a chakram, in her hand. Gaara's shirt had been torn off, and Fu had the chakram only inches above his pale abdomen, "You just had to help that Uzumaki asshole, didn't you? Do how much easier things would've been if you'd just minded your own business? Well, now you're gonna find out what happens to people who hold blades to my throat. Sakura, bring it over!"

"Coming right up," Sakura called back, Naruto glancing over to see that she was standing by the fire with a pair of metal tongs in her hand that she'd gotten from the kitchen. With those tongs, she grabbed something small and metallic from the coals, which could only have been the vial Yagura dropped and Fu threw in the fire. She walked over, trying her best to keep her hands from shaking. The metal was red hot, "Here's hoping I don't drop it!"

Fu licked her lips as Sakura reached her. She brought the chakram down to Gaara's right side and cut a small slit, making him wince in pain. Everyone in the room knew what was coming, though no one wanted to believe it, "I can't wait to hear you scream, desert boy!"

Looking away she did it, Sakura inserted the vial into the slit, which was being held open by Fu, hearing a sizzling sound the moment in made contact. Gaara screamed out in agony, "Ahhhhhhh! Oh, you fucking whore! I'm going to make you regret you were ever born!"

"Big talk coming from a guy tied down to a bed," Fu remarked, ignoring his screams of pain and looking over at Naruto, "Looks like other prisoner is awake. Tenten, how's he doing over there?"

It was only then that Naruto saw Tenten standing beside him, Hinata still chained to her wrist, "He's fine, but he won't be for long. Lord knows what you've got in store for him. Gotta say though, he doesn't seem that scary. Sakura made him out to be this terrifying monster who slaughtered a bunch of people, but I just don't know. Hm, I wonder…"

Tenten's hand went down to Naruto's belt, removing it and throwing it off to the side. Hinata watched with a dropped jaw as she stuck her hand down into his pants, the blonde unable to fight it with the way he tied up. The girl screamed at her, "What do you think you're doing, you pervert?"

"I heard a rumor from some of the older ladies who still remember when there were a lot of Uzumakis around. They said that all these guys are hung like-WOAH MOMMA," Tenten cried out as she was explaining, "I don't know about the rest of them, but he certainly isn't lacking in that area. You know what'd be great? If I could back at Neji for sleeping around by taking this blonde stallion for a ride!"

"You wouldn't dare," Hinata growled, capturing Tenten's attention.

She smiled at the blue hard girl, her hand visibly working Naruto's tool from within his pants, "What, do you still have feelings for this guy? I heard Fu say you two kinda dated back in the Hidden Leaf. Maybe I can kill two birds with one stone. I'll get back at Neji by fucking him, and make you watch to make you pay for defending him all this time. What do you say Naruto? Wanna help me out."

"Go fuck yourself," Naruto said, the first words he got out since he awoke, "Just don't use my dick to do it."

Tenten frowned, reaching down to her holster and retrieving her hunting knife. She held it above Naruto's groin for several seconds before flipping it around, slashing at Hinata's face rather than him. Hinata cried out as a small trickle of blood ran down her cheek. The next thing she knew, Tenten had lightly jab the knife into her leg, just enough to draw blood. It was Naruto's turn to get upset, "Leave her alone! She didn't do jack shit to you!"

The response made Tenten giggle. She pulled her hand out of Naruto's pants and climbed on top of the bed, removing her shirt to reveal she wore nothing underneath. Then she pulled Hinata right up next to the bed using the chain, putting the blade next to her face, as he pulled the blonde's pants down. Tenten untied one of his hands, then got back to stroking his member, "Come on now, lover boy, let's have some fun" Tenten cooed in his ear, holding the bloody knife closer to Hinata's cheek, "If you don't do what I say, I'll cut up more of her pretty little face. Now open wide. We're gonna put that silver tongue of yours to good use, and I expect your hands to be real busy massaging these tits. Got it?"

Not wanting to see Hinata in anymore pain, Naruto gave reluctant nod, grinding his teeth while he did. He reached up the hand she'd untied and groped her right breast, which was a B-cup at best, while she leaned in closer to him. Naruto opened his mouth just enough to let force her tongue inside, massaging it with his own to keep her happy. All the time she continued toying with his tool, moaning in exaggeration simply for the sake digging the knife in Hinata's heart. Something about the situation made any of the actions impossible for Naruto to enjoy.

* * *

 _Yes, in the middle of dead the Teuchi's tavern, in front of god and everybody, Tenten intend to have her way with the young Uzumaki, making Hinata watch while she did. Gaara was not far off, his side still searing with the pain of hot metal underneath his skin. Fu had turned the tables on the two travelers, and they now faced an uncertain future. Never before had the tavern seen images so grizzly or felt a mood so grim..._


	5. Grand Finale

Ladies and gentlemen, the final chapter of the Nefarious Nine is here! Everything that's gone down all comes to a head at last! In terms of how long this chapter is going to be, I don't really any sort of number ahead time. I could be shorter than the ones I've written before, but I have a funny feeling it's going to be on the longer side. After all the shit that went down last chapter, there's a lot of stuff people need to pay for. Will they get what they deserve? I can't say just yet, but I can promise you that there'll be plenty of blood to go around. Thank you for reading and be sure to review.

Chapter Soundtrack-Rodello's Machine: Three Weeks to Go

* * *

"Come on Naruto, at least try to look like you're having fun," Tenten grumbled, straddling his lap, "I know you're not gay. Fu said earlier you were bragging on and on to Roshi about fucking his wife. What, am I not good enough for you?"

Naruto had to keep from grinding his teeth. She obviously wanted him to get hard, but how in the hell was he supposed to in a situation like this? Not only was she not his type in terms of looks, but being bound with a knife to the cheek of his old flame wasn't exactly Naruto's idea of a hot time. Tenten didn't seem like the kind girl who took rejection real well though, so he was going to have to think of something.

Looking down at Hinata, Naruto noticed for the first time how tight the girl's corset was in the chest area. It brought him back to when he was a teenager back in the Hidden Leaf, having just noticed the girl's budding breasts as he went through puberty himself. Hinata had grown into a beautiful woman since then, one with breasts that were at least a DD. Naruto found his breath hitching as he watched them heave up and down as she breathed in and out.

"Well now, there we go," Tenten proclaimed, snapping Naruto out of his daze, "Looks like your little friend is starting to wake up. Just when I thought you couldn't get any bigger."

Naruto realized that that he'd started to get a hard on, which was both a victory and loss for him. This meant Tenten wouldn't flip out on him, but it also meant she had the chance to try and fuck him. Fu was watching the entire thing from the side, laughing her ass off, "Well isn't this a sight. Gotta say Tenten, I never knew you were such a freak. You're gonna give us a show here. Oh, and look at little Hinata, all sad about to cry. Tch, fucking pathetic."

"Would all of you shut the fuck up," Hinata snapped, no longer having the ability to control what was coming out of her mouth, "It's not any freakier than what Sasuke and Sakura have been doing since you've been gone."

"The fuck did you just say?" Fu screamed, making both Sasuke and Sakura freeze and go wide eyed. The head of the gang brought her chakram up, pointing it at her two subordinates, "Is she trying to say that the two of you have been sleeping together behind my back? Don't you dare fucking lie to me!"

Neither of them said a word until Sasuke mustered up enough courage, "Alright Fu, if I'm being honest, yes, Sakura and I have been sex while you've been away. You said that you and me weren't a couple, and you know I can't go long without fucking someone. Sakura was just doing what I asked her, so this is all on me. I'm sure you get that, right?"

Fu didn't respond. She let her eyes wander over to Sakura, who was trembling with fear. The room was silent until Fu brought the chakram back down, after which both gang members breathed a sigh of relief. Those sighs turned into fearful gasps when they saw Fu wind her arm up fling the circular blade at Sakura, aiming directly for her neck. The chakram sliced through her throat as well as her neck bone, passing through the girl and hitting the wall behind her. Sakura didn't move for a few moment, but her head eventually began to teeter, falling clean off from her shoulders. Blood spewed from the decapitated girl's neck, spraying Sasuke and Fu until she fell backwards. It seemed Fu wasn't nearly as calm as her demeanor would've suggested.

"We weren't in a relationship, but you knew I didn't want you fucking other girls, and the other girls knew they weren't supposed to touch you," Fu said, turning to Sasuke, "It was part of the deal foryou staying with us. I'm possessive, you know that. Call me a bitch all you want, but you knew what the deal was. Give me one good reason I shouldn't kill you right now?"

It was time for Sasuke to use his skills with women, since his life depended it, "Well the first thing that comes to mind is that you'd have to find a new guy willing to fuck you as often as you want."

Fu hardly even flinched at thought, "So? Maybe if Tenten gives blondie over there a good enough score, I'll decided to give him the job."

"Oh please," Sasuke scoffed, "Like you'd ever fuck an Uzumaki!"

It was easier for her to reason that out than one might expect, "Hey, the way I see it, dragging him around and making him my personal sex slave is basically torture, and I'd love to torture him. You know what else? I could play for the other team too! Yugito gave me a pretty hot kiss before you guys got in here, and I kinda liked it. Maybe I could get by letting one of my girl's who's got a skilled tongue go down on me, eh?"

Sasuke had a hard time disputing those two points, "You could, but it would take awhile for you to get used to it. I know everything you like. It takes me less than ten minutes get you to your peak. How long will it take you to find another person who can do that?"

"That's the first good point you've made," Fu told him, her voice lowering, "Go on, give me something else to work with."

"How about that I'm the best sniper you're ever gonna find?" Sasuke offered, realizing it was his strongest argument, "How many times as my sniping saved this gang's ass? Even if you don't need me as a lover, you do need me as a killer."

That one managed to get Fu's attention. She mulled it over for a moment, then put the chakram up against Sasuke's groin, "For now, I'm going to let you live. However, if you so much a feel up another girl, I swear to good, I will fucking castrate you! You understand me, dipshit?"

Sasuke gave a dumb nod, thanking god when she took the blade away from his balls. Both he and Fu looked back at Tenten, instantly realizing that she had been obvlious to the entire fight that had just gone down. She was wearing no clothes by this point, and had lined up Naruto's 'tool' with her entrance, "Oh, fuck I need this so bad. It's gonna be so good!"

"For shit's sake Tenten, get off him already," Fu snapped, though Tenten had already lowered herself halfway down, "I'm not in mood to hear you screaming his name right now. Besides, all this talk of fucking has got hot and bothered. I need someone to watch them while I make Sasuke give me a proper apology."

Tenten, noticing the headless Sakura, did as she was told, but pouted as she did, "But Fu, this is got me all worked up too. I need to get some release, you know?"

"We could always have her join us," Sasuke suggested, which quickly earned a glare from his lover, "Or not, we could also not do that."

Once she shut him up, Fu turned back to Tenten, "Yugito usually brought some kinda toys with her, you can use one of those. I don't care if you give them a show, just watch these fuckers while I teach this guy some manners and remind him who's boss. Sasuke, how's the weather outside?"

Sasuke peaked out the window and said, "Storm's mostly calmed down right now. You don't want them watching us I take it?"

"No, I don't," Fu said, kicking open the door, "Come on, you're gonna fuck me against the wall of this place until I feel like you've made up for being a horny pig."

* * *

Even though Naruto no longer had to worry about a girl more or less raping him, things didn't really get any more pleasant after that. His eardrums were bombarded with the sounds of Fu screaming through walls, crying out things like, 'Harder you bastard, I said harder,' and 'That's it, you dick, pound that pussy!' That alone was bed enough, but Tenten did as her boss suggested and found Yugito's things, discovering a toy that she used to pleasure herself in front everyone, having chained up Hinata by the fireplace while she did.

Hinata's chained reached far enough that she was able to sit next to Naruto, both of them watching as Tenten put her clothes back on. It was impossible for the girl not to notice the bulge in the assassin's once again pulled up pants, "Looks like you were enjoying the view."

"I'm a guy; you put a naked girl in front of me playing with herself, that's the reaction I'm bound to have," Naruto defend himself, eyeing Hinata as he did, "Besides, it wasn't just her. I was thinking about what it might look like if a certain someone was in her place…"

Once she understood what he meant, Hinata couldn't hide the blush on her face, "You really do still think about me that way, don't you?"

"Maybe," Naruto admitted, unable to stop himself from asking, "What about you? How do you feel about me?"

Hinata smiled for the first time in what seemed like days, "Let me put it to you this way; if we manage to get out of this alive, I promise to give you a gift that'll show you just how much I've missed you all these years."

The sweet moment came to a close when Naruto realized that Hinata could reach Han's shotgun on the table from where she was chained up. It was a massive oversight on Tenten's part, and one he couldn't believe she'd made. He whispered to Hinata in the lowest tone possible, knowing what could happen if Tenten heard them, "Hey, it looks like you can reach to that double barrel over there. If you get the chance, you need to sneak over there and get it."

"Why?" Hinata asked, matching his vocal level, "It's empty, not like it would do us any good. I mean, I guess I could swing it at her, but Tenten's got a gun, and so does Sasuke and Fu. All I'd do by going for it is get myself killed."

Naruto just confirmed exactly what he'd been hoping for, "Good, so they don't about the shotgun's little secret. Alright, I need you to listen to me very carefully…"

As he was speaking, Fu and Sasuke reentered the room, both with wrinkled clothes and their hair in a mess. It appeared that the sniper was back in her good graces, "You have no idea how lucky you are that you're good in the sack. Let's see how the 'Kazekage' is doing. Are you even keeping that load up of bullshit up, Gaara?"

"You are going to regret putting me through all this when you realize that every word I've said is true," Gaara snapped, the group not noticing Naruto leaning away from Hinata. It was the first thing he'd said in some time, having remained silent so that he could focus on blocking out the pain, "If you thought the Hyuuga's were going to do some awful things to you, then just imagine what I've got planned!"

"Big words from a guy with a hunk of metal in his gut," Fu quipped, grabbing the tongs Sakura used before and shoving them into the slit she'd made roughly half an hour ago. He screamed out as she removed the vial, which was covered in dried blood. After looking down at the mark, Fu told him, "Hm, looks like it's only a flesh wound. Too bad, I guess you get live longer with me torturing you. Don't worry, right now I wanna focus on putting the Uzumaki through some pain. I promise, you'll get my attention soon enough."

Fu walked away from Gaara and made her way towards Naruto, her chakram in her hand. She saw Hinata as she walked, displeased by how close she was to the Uzumaki, "Tenten, get the rich bitch connected back to your wrist. We don't want her getting any funny ideas."

The girl nodded and ran over to Hinata's chain, connecting it back to her wrist as Fu reached Naruto. She walked around him, trying to decide how best to torture him. Naruto could see in her eyes how much pleasure those thoughts brought her, "You've been waiting a long time to do this, haven't you? I bet you've got so many ideas in that fucked up head of yours."

"I do, but the longer I think about it, the more my mind keeps coming back to the same thing," Fu said, reaching into the assassin's vest pocket and pulling out an envelope. Naruto jerked in an effort to get it back, but his hands were tied too tightly, "Ha, I knew that'd get a rise outta you. You were so proud of this damn letter, a letter that you said came right from the Third Hokage himself. Talk about a load of shit."

"The letter's real, you fucking bitch," Naruto snapped, his teeth bared, "I swear, if you even scratch that thing, I'll carve out your heart and feed it to you!"

Fu drank in his rage like it was fine wine, "Hurt it? No, Uzumaki, I'm not gonna hurt it, at least not yet. I'm gonna read it outloud to the entire room. I want them to hear the bullshit that Bee and a whole lot of other people fell for. Won't that be fun?"

Naruto didn't think so, "The letter means a lot to me. You say whatever you want about it, but I'll defend it to my grave. Go ahead, read it all you want. I'd love to hear it again."

"Well, if you insist," Fu replied, taking out the letter before making her way to the center of the room. She was making this a grand performance of sorts, "Everyone get comfy, because it's time for a little show."

Clearly her throat, Fu began in on the letter, reading it word for word, "Dear Naruto, it's been far too long since I last spoke to you. All is well in the Hidden Leaf, at least for now. Konohamaru misses you qutie a bit, and still asks me from time to time if there's anyway he could visit you. It seems my grandson will always admire you. I cannot say that I blame him. I've heard that you signed on for the war against the budding village calling themselves the Hidden Sound. Though I don't know if you're in it for the money or for the sake of stopping a dangerous new village, I'm happy to hear it either way. I Perhaps, one day, if you gain enough fame across these many places you've been staying, the Hidden Leaf will let you rejoin our ranks. While I still don't agree with what you did to the Namikaze clan, I understand that you're young and that you had your reasons. I've been busy as of late, so it's tough to send you as many letters as I'd like, but I'm glad I found time to write you one tonight. You'll always been like a sort of grandson to me, and I hope to see or hear from you again soon. May the Will of Fire continue to burn within you. Sincerely, Hiruzen Sarutobi, Third Hokage of the Hidden Leaf."

Fu scoffed when she finished the letter, shaking her head, "I can't believe that Bee even believed a word of this. What to do you think guys? Should I just toss it in the fire? Maybe someone can piss on it, huh? So many good possibilities."

"Toss it in the fire? Are you insane?" Hinata cried, startling all those around her, "Naruto's not lying! The letter's real!"

That sort of forced Fu to ask, "What are you talking about? There's no way you could possibly know that."

Hinata frantically began to explain, "That second to last the line, about the 'Will of Fire', that's how I know. It was the Third's trademark! He signed all of his personal correspondence that way, and only his closest friends knew about it. I remember my father getting a couple of the letters that ended like that when I was young. I'm telling you, that's proof that it's a real letter and that it's worth a lot of money! The Third Hokage died, so there aren't many letters like that left! People would pay a small fortune for it! Are you actually gonna destroy something that valuable out of spite?"

"Wow, that is quite a story you've got there," Fu said, getting closer to the fire, "I don't believe it, but it's one hell of a story."

Before she could throw the letter in, Sasuke ran over to Fu, grabbing her arm, "Woah, hold on a second. I can't say for sure, but I think I remember my dad saying something about the whole 'Will of Fire' thing once. Maybe, we should just keep letter, at least until we can say for sure it's a fake. If it is real, who knows how much money it might be worth?"

Fu gave Sasuke a sort of death glare. She looked around the room to see everyone staring at her, on the edge of their seats about what she'd do, before putting the letter back in the envelope and handing it to her lover, "I guess we'll need the cash after losing this kinda talent today. If you're wrong about that letter though, I'm gonna make it your next meal!"

"Wouldn't be the first thing you made me eat," Sasuke said with a mischievous grin, placing the letter in his pocket, "I'll just keep this here until we get it check out."

At that point, Hinata was feeling pretty happy with herself, which didn't sit well with Tenten. She soon thought of a way to amend the issue, "Oh Hinata, I hope you don't mind, but I've still got an itch that needs scratching. Your hands gonna get jerked around a bit, just warning you."

Hinata was leaning against the table, which her chain just barely reached, when she felt her chained wrist being yanked down. Tenten, who was sitting on the opposite end of the table, had slipped her hand down to her waist and past her panties. It didn't take a genius to figure out what she was doing, "Seriously Tenten, you still need to get off? God, it's a miracle you and Neji ever left the bedroom."

"Don't bring up that cheating bastard to me," Tenten spat, continuing her 'work', "Yeah, we used to screw a lot, but I'll never touch me again. Doesn't matter how big a dick your cousin has, it'll be challenging for him to get it up after what I did to him."

That was the last straw for Hinata. She grabbed the shotgun from the table and flicked the second trigger as Naruto had told her to do, allowing the blades to pop out. With her newfound weapon in hand, Hinata took aim and gave a mighty swing towards Tenten's chain baring arm. One motion all that was needed to slice it clean off, with the gang member screaming as she lost the appendage. Hinata's arm, on the other hand, was now free, with only a severed limb weighing her down. Sasuke and Fu had both began to draw their weapons, so she knew she had a limited amount of time to act. The shotgun still in hand, Hinata sprinted the brief distance between her and Naruto and slashed at the ropes holding back his hands. Now free, the assassin tackled Hinata to ground, certain the two of them would want to stay low. By this point the girl was shaking, so Naruto whispered to her, "Calm down Hinata, you did good, real fucking good. Leave the rest of this to me though. I'm gonna need to be near perfect to pull this one off."

Naruto looked around to try and locate his Jackknife, which turned out to be located on the other corner of the room on the bar, adjacent to Fu and Sasuke. It was a longshot, but one that he had to take. He jumped up and ran for his gun, knowing all the time that his enemies had him in their sights. Sasuke, ever the marksmen, was ready with his finger by the trigger of his rifle, but ended up with a hinderance when tried to fire. When he took his shot, Fu threw her chakram at the same instant, elbowing Sasuke in the shoulder and completely ruining his aim. His bullet ended up missing Naruto by a wide margin, and Fu's chakram only slashed into his left leg. The sniper was less than pleased, "Shit, I missed! What in the hell were you thinking Fu?"

"I was thinking I don't want that bastard to get his gun," Fu screamed as Naruto grabbed his Jackknife and spun around, shooting the gang leader in the shoulder, "Fucking shit, that's my throwing arm!"

The assassin tried to fire again, but found his gun to be empty. By his count, there should've been three bullets left after that shot and the two he put in Utakata's chest, but he didn't have time to figure what had happened to them. Right now, he had to take out Sasuke, the only other person in the room he knew for sure had a gun and could use it. Naruto had luck on his side for the moment, as his foe's primitive sniper rifle needed to be reloaded after a single shot. Sasuke was able to do it quickly thanks to all the practice he'd had over the years, but it still gave the assassin the window he needed. Using every last ounce of energy he had in him, Naruto made a mad dash for his one time comrade, the gash on his leg bleeding all the way. He could see that Sasuke had gotten his bullet into the gun and was cocking it just as he reached him, but Naruto had enough to reach out and grab the barrel, yanking it to the side so that he could bring his arm back. In that time it took the Uchiha to open his mouth, the assassin rammed the blade on his Jackknife into Sasuke's throat. Blood oozed from the wound, leaving the sniper speechless.

"I'm sorry Sasuke, this isn't how I wanted it to go down, believe me," Naruto muttered, pressing the switch on his gun to rotate the blade, spraying crimson everywhere and making certain the poor fool died right then and there, "I wish there was some other way...I'll see ya in the afterlife."

Naruto pulled the Jackknife out of Sasuke's body and let him crash to the ground. Fu, with her bodyguard dead, made a last stitch effort to lunge at the assassin, who quickly punched her in jaw, stopping that plan before it even got off the ground. Over by the table, he could hear Tenten still screaming in pain, so he grabbed Sasuke's rifle and walked over to her, intent on ending her suffering. Hinata must not have wanted that, because she came sprinting over stopped him before he got anywhere near Tenten, "No, don't shoot her!"

"Don't shoot her?" Naruto asked, flabbergasted, "She tried to fucking rape me and did who knows what else to your cousin! Why in the hell should we let her live?"

Sweet little Hinata was about to show her dark side, "Because if we kill her, she gets put out of her misery to early. I want her to live with only have one arm, just like Neji will have to live being blind for the rest of his life after she gouged his eyes out!"

Naruto found himself more than happy to oblige that request. He motioned to the folded sheets in the corner of the room and said, "In that case, you'll wanna get her all bandaged up before she loses anymore blood. Looks like she's lost almost three pints already. Much more than that, and she'll end up dead. Let me cut down Gaara and then I'll make sure she lives through this."

"At last, sweet freedom," Gaara sighed as Naruto used his Jackknife slice him free, his arms falling to his side, "God, my arms feel like logs after that. Now if I only I didn't have burning pain in my side!"

That was something Naruto already figured out how to take care of "Don't worry, I've got a friend that can fix you up with something for the pain. Just let me go get her."

Hinata and Gaara were both left stunned. They had no clue what he was talking about, as the young woman soon asked him, "What friend? If you had a friend out there, why didn't you send her in here to save us ages ago?"

"They're way out in the middle of desert, I didn't have a way to get her attention from where I was," Naruto said, heading back over to Fu and kicking her in the chest before she could stand back up, "Before that though, we need to decide what I'm going to do with her. Anyone have a preference? I'm partial to burning her alive myself, but I'm open to suggestions."

Gaara had other things in mind, "I've got more than just a suggestion, Uzumaki, I've got an offer. Let me bring her into the Hidden Sand alive to torture her myself, and I swear I'll make you a wealthy man. Between taking down her, saving me, and the other bodies of the dead criminals, I can guarantee you half a million ryo in cash. A little present I can give you, thanks to being Kazekage."

All of the sudden, Naruto found it much easier to believe Gaara was the leader of the Hidden Leaf, "Sounds like a nice deal. I've got some land in the Rice Country I got after fighting against the Hidden Sound. Think the Hidden Sand would have any interest in buying it?"

"Oh, I'm certain they will," Gaara said, catching his drift, "For a nice price too. You head out and get your friend. I'll be certain to tie up this bitch here."

Fu, hearing all of this, reached into her pocket and pulled out a knife, putting it up to her wrist, "No way in hell am I gonna stick around to get tortured by people like you, Kazekage or not!"

"Really, is that the best plan you've got?" Gaara asked, snatching the knife out of her hand before it could so much as draw an ounce of blood. Naruto had left the room by that point, so Gaara grabbed the rope she'd tied them up with before, the pieces that were still long enough anyways, and bound her hands behind her back, "You're not going out that easily after all you've done. I'm going to do everything to you that you did to us and then some. I'll burn, cut, and beat you until you've gone mad, and once you're a prisoner inside your own mind, thinking it's the one place where you can find solace, I'll send you to hell where you belong!"

"Maybe I'll save a seat for ya," Fu growled before Gaara took one of the smaller pieces of rope and shoved it into her mouth as a gag.

The next few minutes were spent taking care of Tenten and making certain that Fu was unable to move. If there was one thing they didn't need, it was that crazy bitch getting out again. Whoever Naruto had left to retrieve, it took him a bit more time they would've expect for him to get her. Yet, after a nearly 20 minute wait, the young man returned with a young woman beside him. She had red hair, red eyes, and was a tad bit shorter than Naruto. Both Gaara and Hinata were silent, waiting for an introduction. Naruto was eager to give them one, "Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to Karin Uzumaki, my cousin. She's the one who patches me up after tough battles and looks after my cash. I have to keep her hidden to keep her safe, so she always travels a mile or two behind me. Kind of a pain on days like today when we've got sandstorms and whatnot, but it's kept us alive so far."

That left them with more questions than answer. Hinata felt forced to ask, "Didn't you say you were the last member of your family? And how is she possibly any good to you if she's far behind you at all times? How did you too even meet?"

"Well I have someone go get her if I need to," Naruto said, waving off the concern, "And she comes over and check up on me if I haven't contact her in too long. How we met is a story I'll tell you in a little bit, and as for me saying I'm the last member of my family, well…"

Naruto and Karin said at the same time, "We're Uzumaki's, what'd you expect?"

Everyone in the room, within the exception of Tenten and Fu, laughed at the little joke. Karin cracked her neck and pulled up a medical bag, the only object she'd brought with her. She opened it and said with a grin, "Alright, we've got a lot of work to do here and not a ton of time. Get in line people, the doctor is in!"

* * *

Karin made short work of the injuries brought to her, starting with Tenten and telling the story of how she and Naruto had met as they went. As it turned out, it was the simplest story they'd heard all day. Before he left the Hidden Leaf, Naruto took with him a record of every Uzumaki who'd made it out of the massacre at the village. After searching for years and years, he eventually found out a talented medic by the name of Karin that was being kept in Hidden Sound was his only remaining cousin. In reality, that had been the reason he joined up in the war. After the battles were over, Naruto found her and introduced himself. As it turned out, she'd been looking for her family as well, and the two ended up hitting it off. Ever since then, they'd been traveling with one another, Naruto working as an assassin so that the two of them could stay in extravagant hotels and live the high life, while Karin patched him up and handled the actual managing of the money. It was the perfect arrangement for the two of them. Her story ended at a perfect moment, and she had finished sewing up Tenten's new nub, closing Naruto's leg gash, and giving Gaara enough painkillers to make him forget his searing wound.

With her work done, Hinata had a rather important favor to ask of Karin. She wanted to be alone with Naruto for a while, a couple of hours in fact. What Hinata needed was Karin to think of an excuse to get everyone but her and the blonde out of the room, and the young woman had no problem doing that for her. It seemed Naruto had spoken of blue haired girl before, and Karin was overjoyed that he had a chance to reconnect with his lost friend. So, she'd made up some story about needing help in the stable for Gaara and locked the two prisoners in the wagon, leaving Hinata alone with Naruto, sitting next to him on the same bed he'd be bound to. What happened next was entirely up to her...

* * *

 _(Slight Lemon/Lime Warning)_

Hinata's heart raced as she looked into Naruto's eyes. His gaze wasn't on her, as he was checking out his own leg wound, but she still found herself lost in those crystal blue orbs. She put a gentle hand on his arm, mustering up all the courage she could to say, "Naruto, do remember when is said I wanted to give you gift if the two of us got out of this?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah," Naruto said, his eyes jumping back up to her, "Did you wanna give it to me now or something?"

Her voice got caught in her throat. Hinata had no idea how to start a conversation like this. All she could think to do was grab Naruto's face with both hands, pulling him close to her. Their lips met shortly after, sending shivers down Hinata's spin. Naruto instinctively grabbed her by the waste, responding by letting his tongue brushed across her lips. She opened her mouth a little wider, allowing the kiss to get a little more heated. They held each other closer, Hinata's breast pressing against his chest and Naruto's member beginning to grow within his pants.

"You're getting pretty excited," Hinata giggled, Naruto's face turning the color of a tomato, "Don't worry, this is exactly the reaction I was hoping for. Lay down, let me take care of you."

Naruto could hardly believe it as she pushed him onto his back and started to pull down his pants, "Wait, we're really gonna do this? Right here, right now?"

It didn't take much work to get his bottoms off, leaving him in only his shirt, which Hinata went right to unbuttoning, "I love you Naruto, and I never thought I'd see you again. I've got a chance to be with you, and I'm going to take it. Just be gentle...it's my first time."

"Don't worry, it's mine too," Naruto said, now naked and leaning up to kiss her. She pushed him down before he could reach her, "What?"

"Before, Tenten said something about you bragging about sleeping with someone's wife," Hinata recalled, "What about her?"

Naruto had almost forgotten about that himself, "That was a load of bullshit I said to get Roshi to go for his gun. Long story. All you need to know is that you're my first time. Closest I've come before this was a titfuck from a girl I saved back in the Hidden Sound...you look like you could give me a way better one though."

That got Hinata giggling again, "I think we should try it the normal way first. Just let me get this corset off."

"Allow me," Naruto said, grabbing his Jackknife from beside the bed and slicing the corset off in less than five seconds. With the most constricting garment gone, it didn't take him long to get Hinata completely disrobed, "I've wanted to do that since I was 14."

"Naruto, that corset was-OHHH," Hinata moaned mid sentence, a wave of pleasure emanating from her chest, "Forget the corset, keep doing what you're doing!"

The young Uzumaki had been unable to control himself when he saw her perfect, bountiful breast in front of him. He took one of the bright pink nipples into his mouth, rolling his tongue around it, while cupping the other double D mound in his hand. She reach down and grabbed his member while he worked, biting her lip to surprise a moan. Any thoughts of doubt went away from the two of them at that moment. Over the next two hours, the room was filled with the sounds of joyous screams and grateful moans. Neither of them could get enough of the other's body. Karin even had to call into the room once to remind Naruto to watch his stitches. For the two first time lovers, it was the greatest night of the their lives, at least up to that point. They hoped there would be many more like it to come.

 _(Slight Lemon/Lime End)_

* * *

 _What followed after the bloodiest night Teuchi's Tavern had ever seen was a series of events few could've predicted. Calling it a 'happy ending' wouldn't be all that accurate, but considering all of the death and betrayal that had occurred, things could've gone far worse._

 _Hinata was true to her word about letting Tenten live with one arm, though she didn't leave her in best of states. Tenten was dropped off a few miles from the tavern with only enough food and water to last her a few days, along with a knife to defend herself. Weather or not she survived was something Hinata may never know._

 _Gaara, as it turned out, was not only telling the truth about being the Kazekage of the Hidden Sand, but was also a member of the village's most prestigious family. His home was glad to have him back, and more than willing to compensate Naruto fro all of his hard work. Between the land he'd sold them, the bounties he'd brought them, saving Gaara, and handing over Fu to them, he was able to leave the village with 650,000 ryo in a suitcase._

 _Speaking of Fu, the world all around was grateful that the notorious criminal had at last been apprehended for good. She would find that being Kazekage wasn't the only thing Gaara was telling the truth about, as he made good on every torturous thing he promised her. When he was at last satisfied, he brought her to the town square and hung by the neck. Her final words to the world were a brief and simple, 'Fuck you.'_

 _Naruto, feeling an obligation to his old friends, saw to it that Teuchi and Ayame got a proper burial, and made sure that Bee's body was sent back to his home in the Hidden Cloud. The two strangers, Shino and Kabuto, we're both Hidden Leaf villagers, so Naruto simply took them with him on his way there. Yes, after years upon years of exile, the young Uzumaki was at last returning to the village he'd left so long ago. After all, he did have to return Hinata home._

 _When he arrived, it was only because he had Hinata with him that he wasn't shot on sight. She was allowed to enter and given a heartfelt reunion with her father and other family members, though none were too happy that she was traveling with Naruto. They were even less happy when they discovered she'd given the Uzumaki her virginity, a big deal in the Hyuuga clan. Hinata had to pull out every clan law she could remember to keep them from killing Naruto, eventually realizing that there was always the option that she could marry him. It wasn't long before a Hyuuga Elder remind her that he needed a half a million ryo wedding dowry to do something like that, a custom all none Hyuuga males marrying into the clan had to abide by. Imagine their surprise when he was able to pay that and have enough money left over to start up his own business._

 _Indeed, he and Karin, who was living with Naruto and Hinata in the house they'd gotten as a wedding gift from her father, bought a building in town and opened up a shop specifically catering to assassins. Between Naruto's knowledge on weapons and tracking down targets, and Karin's skills at creating medical kits specifically designed for certain types of missions, they found themselves making money hand over fist in no time. It was a good thing too, because it turned out that Naruto was about to have a family to pay for. Hinata's 'gift' had gotten her pregnant, and the young couple couldn't have been happier. Thanks to his new status with the Hyuuga's and a lucrative business, Naruto once again had a home and a family in the Hidden Leaf, and he didn't plan on losing either of them this time._

* * *

"Honey, come back to bed," Hinata pouted, covered by nothing but a blanket as she watched Naruto writing something down in his journal by the nightstand, "I promise, whatever you're doing will still be there in the morning."

Naruto chuckled, putting his pen down and closing the book. He was wearing nothing but his boxers as he climbed into bed next to his wife of 3 and half months. Slipping his hand under the covers, Naruto rubbed Hinata's extended stomach, whispering into her ear, "Hard to believe we're about to be parents, huh? What do you think; spiky blonde hair or straight blue hair?"

"I don't care, as long as he's got your whiskers," Hinata giggled, then gave a mock sigh, "You know, we're supposed to leave early to head to the Hidden Sand tomorrow, but I'm just not tired. If only there was some way for you to help me burn off some of this energy…"

That was all the invitation that Naruto needed. The two would spend another night wrapped in one another's arms, wondering about the future that laid ahead of them. Both of them knew how quickly things could change, but for now, all they wanted to do was enjoy what they'd been given.

And to think, all of this began with Nine Nefarious individuals all locked together in a tavern...


End file.
